Impulsiveness - I am so upset..... | Autism PDD

I had an appointment today at the local YMCA to see about an aftercare for Michael when he starts kindergarten in the fall, since I will be back to work. Our local YMCA offers aftercare for children with special needs at a few area schools. Michael's particular school doesn't have it, so he'll need to be bused to another location. The aftercare program at his own school really cannot accomodate special needs children. Anyway, when we went to the office today, I had both boys with me. My 3 1/2 year old, Christopher, was being good as gold. Michael, however, was a nightmare. He kept getting off my lap, running around, shutting off the lights, opening office doors, etc. He seems to do this a lot in new places. Anyway, the woman thought it was CHRISTOPHER I was enrolling in aftercare and was so nice to him. When I corrected her and said that he wasn't Michael, she looked at Michael and sighed and said "oy". I was so mad; I mean, this is a program to accomodate special needs children? What does she think autistic children are like? She said they'd take him on a 2 week trial basis, and that the ratio would be 2 to 1 for his group (I'm guessing 2 kids to one caretaker). I am having visions of him walking through his aftercare school opening doors, running and hiding, etc. The implulsiveness is getting very, very problematic. I am seriously thinking about calling our pediatrician to get an ADD/ADHD evaluation to try to get him some meds. He's doing so well at preschool this year; they never have this problem with him (of course, he's been there 2 years, and ALL the kids there are on the spectrum). I don't know what to do. I've already signed a teaching contract and everything else is in place. I am worried that if this doesn't work out, I won't find any other place who will take him.

Anyway, if anyone has some advice or feedback regarding medication or anything else, I'd love the help. What a bad day. He was having such a great week otherwise, and then this today.

PS -- My PERSONAL experience with the Young Mens' CHRISTIAN Association (YMCA) is that they are NOT accommodating to the autistic. Of course, this might be only MY experience. But the experience I've had with the Young Men's HEBREW Association (YMHA) at a couple of locations has been the OPPOSITE. The fact that the YMHA's around here are the ones with programs specifically for the autistic and are the ones who typically sponsor Special Olympics meets, not the YMCA's, help fuel that perception on my part. Not to mention my own poor experience with my son at the YMCA. You might want to see if there's a YMHA around you. They tend to be VERY accommodating to kids with disabilities.

tzoya39220.574849537I went to a talk on positive discipline last nite. The speaker said
that impulse control IS hard for ALL preschool age children. So
don't despair. I have found that waiting is very hard for my
son. I understand that the first impression in a prospective after
school care probably is important, but really, these people must
have seen many active boys!

I try to bring some engaging activity/toy when I know that my son
has to wait somewhere. Works often, but not always. I have had
to interrupt discussions with his therapist midway because he
ran off and got into the elevator, many times. Interestingly, the speaker last nite (who was talking about kids in general, not
special needs), gave the advice to preapre your kids in advance
for doing something that is hard for them (in my son's case,
waiting) and even have an incentive at the end (if you wait nicely
we'll go out for icecream). Apparently if they know what to
expect, the outcome is much better.

I don't want to undermine your concerns and travails, but this by
itself IMO does not warrant medication.

Good luck!
Nupur

Hands up here too ... YMCA program did not work for Nick. I sent him to a pre-K program there (pre-diagnosis), and the teacher called him "insolent", and constantly called me at work to say how "difficult" he was. Meanwhile, he had never been a problem at his sitters or at head start. After a month I pulled him.

We had a bad experience with YMCA too after a 10 year membership. They promote that they are understand special needs kids but I found the total opposite happened with us..never will go back! (LONG STORY!)My ds does the same in a new place - run around and open every door
and drawer. He settles down after being in a place for a while (like a
week). My ds has a adhd dx but we have had bad reactions to meds so far
and I am not sure I will try again.
That place did not sound promising. I'm not sure where you live but I
have been surprised at how many places offer services.Or how about an
au-pair- I did that for a year and it worked well for the family.

If you think your son would benefit more from a sitter than an after-school program, you could try this service. MamaKat found it -- see more on her post "BABYSITTERS!!!"

http://www.sittercity.com/home.html

Good luck with everything. I'm sorry the YMCA didn't give you a good first impression.