My son showing maturity For those of you who don't know, my dad died a few weeks ago. I wanted to share a few things that my son did that, in my opinion, showed an amazing amount of maturity... First, when I was preparing him that grandpa might die - he said to me, "Mom I'm really worried about (dd - his sister). She is too young to go through something like this." Wow. Incredible amount of empathy in those statements. And not so much worried about himself - and he's going through the same thing. Then, once we got to Illinois - my ds knew grandpa was dying but wanted to go visit him anyway. He was very appropriate and handled it well. He said his good-byes, kissed grandpa, held his hand, teared up, but held it together (not that I would have cared if he had started bawling, mind you). That night he asked if he could go see him again - I told him yes. So they both came the next morning and said good-bye again. The next night he asked if he could go again if grandpa lived through the night. I said that he had said good-bye and I wasn't sure if it wouldn't be too hard on him to keep saying good-bye. My ds said to me, "Mom, I would keep saying good-bye to grandpa a thousand times if I could." Wow. Then, my dad died. I had my dh go home and wake the kids to tell them and give them the choice of whether or not they wanted to see grandpa. There was not going to be a wake (dad was cremated) and this would be their only chance to see him again. They both chose to come. They both said good-bye again and hugged and kissed him. My dh took my dd home - she was having a hard time with it. My ds asked to stay with me - he said he thought I might need some help (seriously!). He stayed and I had to go down the hall to get another bag to pack up my dad's things and I asked ds to come with me. He said, "Mom, I'd like to have  some time alone with Grandpa if you don't mind." He's 8 years old. I don't know many 8 year olds who would want to be in a room alone with a dead person - even if it's their grandpa. When I came back, he was just touching Grandpa's hand gently. Ds helped me pack up the rest of my dad's things and helped me carry them to the car. The day before the memorial, the priest asked me who was doing the readings. I hadn't even thought of it - so my dh said he would do it. I mentioned to the kids that daddy would be doing that and my ds asked if kids would be allowed to do something like that - and I said well, I supposed so. He asked if he could do a reading. The first reading didn't have lots of difficult Biblical words, so he practiced it and practiced it. He had never read in public before and my husband was nervous about ds reading in public. For some reason, I wasn't - I knew he would make grandpa proud. And he did - he did beautifully. He even stood up there with my husband when he did the responsorial psalm and 2nd readings. Almost no one at the memorial knew of my ds' autism - and so many people came up and complimented him. One person told me I should be very proud and my son was going to go far - he had so much poise up there on the altar. My dad's gift to me this year? Showing me and reminding me how wonderful my ds can be and what wonderful qualities he has to offer. WOW!! amazing!! sorry for your loss! kristin i'm sorry about your loss. what you have written is beautiful. you brought tears to my eyes. good job mom, good job ds <3 Truely amazing! What a wonderful post!  That is wonderful of your son, especially the reading. We handled death so differently in my family, growing up -- I love the way you included the kids in everything.  So much healthier and ... inclusive! That's so touching.  You have every reason to be proud of your son. That's so sweet. Wow Snoopywoman.  So Sorry for your loss.  So proud of your DS!!  So happy for you as a mom.  That is your cmfort at this time of grief. Concernedpa.
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