Acting up at school/should I help? My ds does much better at home than in school. Part of it is that the environment and expectations are different and part of it is that I know him better and have had many years of figuring out what works best with him. I usually think the schools need to figure it out while he is there just as I need to figure it out while he is home. That way they take more ownership, he might learn something I would not have thought off and -like you said- I am not there. There have been a few occasions though where I realized that the teacher just did not get a certain aspects and then I tried to help. For example last year he was having meltdowns in mainstream and the teachers kept taking turns in trying to talk him down which -DUH- did not work. I gave his teachers a two page paper on how to address revolving meltdowns in kids on the spectrum that talked about how they are triggered and what works -  like sensory breaks with no talk. It worked and everyone was better off. I guess what I am saying is that it is best to find a place of cooperation with school where you respect each others strength and limitations. I have encountered several teachers who right of the bat thought I was a clueless indulgent parent just by the virtue of having a kid with behavior challenges.  I found it better not to argue with them initially because it might take a while for them to realize that my kid has challenges that are not due to me 'spoiling him at home.' If you argue you will only make yourself the target as the cause of the behavior. Behavior problems due to different neurological wiring can be addressed but they are in a different category/universe than your typical kid misbehaviors and often need to be addressed differently. I think that is very hard to understand for people who do not have had that experience in their personal life. As a sped teacher, I can tell you it best when home and school work together.  If you have ideas that work at home than I would tell the teacher about what you do at home.  My dd have a brief stint of behavior problems way back in preschool (she's in 3rd grade now).  I worked with her teacher, if she got in trouble at school there were consequences at home.  This nipped the problem in the bud.  She has never had any behavior problems (at school) since starting kindergarten. I had a student this year that was completely out of control.  He threw chairs at me, knocked over his desk repeatedly, assaulted other students.  His mom said she wanted no consequences for his behavior.  She didn't believe in consequences and there were no consequences in the home.  She only believed in redirection.  It's hard to redirect a child throwing a chair at you, or hitting his aide in the face with a phone.  I did try many suggestions the mom gave us, but they never worked.  I really like my students' parents to feel we are a team working for a common goal.  I welcome their suggestions, and hope they will support my suggestions as well.  My six year old has recently began bucking the system.  He has ABA at home is in 1st grade at school.  He has been refusing to work at times in both places.  We have an Autism Specialist at home that coordinates his therapies and she is redoing all of that and has created a new program for rewards.  We have seen some small improvement at home.  He has improved at school to get rid of the aggressive behaviors but he is still refusing to do some things at school.  We talk to him alot about being good at school the next day to try to help but the bottom line is they are in over their heads.  I advised them to call in the district's Autism Specialist to which they replied that she was no longer in the district.  I figure once we figure it out at home we can give them some ideas but ultimately isn't the district responsible for handling this?  He has a BIP and IEP but both of these were completed before these behaviors started.  [QUOTE=Rare_Combo]My six year old has recently began bucking the system.  He has ABA at home is in 1st grade at school.  He has been refusing to work at times in both places.  We have an Autism Specialist at home that coordinates his therapies and she is redoing all of that and has created a new program for rewards.  We have seen some small improvement at home.  He has improved at school to get rid of the aggressive behaviors but he is still refusing to do some things at school.  We talk to him alot about being good at school the next day to try to help but the bottom line is they are in over their heads.  I advised them to call in the district's Autism Specialist to which they replied that she was no longer in the district.  I figure once we figure it out at home we can give them some ideas but ultimately isn't the district responsible for handling this?  He has a BIP and IEP but both of these were completed before these behaviors started.  [/QUOTE] is he finding the work to hard .or is it more that he just dosnt want to do it .dose he have an aid with him in the class .i acted out some at school becuse it was hard for me i have severe learing diosibilty along with autism .so i guss i was a litte aggressive at school .they need to help him to do what he soupod to do I am not really sure.  I think he is bored with some of the repetition.  Other times he just gets mad at them.  Maybe his breaks aren't frequent enough.  He is doing this in the sped room.  I haven't heard if it is happening in the gen ed class but I would be interested to know.  I guess my question is more along the lines of "don't they have to help try to figure it out?"  I mean I am not there so I can't figure out the problem.  It could be something simple that is setting him off but only someone that comes in to observe as  third party would be able to figure it out.
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