problem??? there was a teacher in my school that evently got fire for hitting he did it a few times when i was there an.i heard years later he got fired for doing it agin .i saw him drag my friend by her hair into his office once .i soime of us were afid to say anything   I second everything Kelly is saying, Also, I would ask immediately for another aide. Why risk it? I think you need to have a meeting with the teacher and an aide. The strongest relationship my DS has at school is with his aide who is a fierce advocate for him. I wouldn't have an aide who is pesimistic about any child. Especially mine. The other thing to address is the dragging him into the bathroom every time his hands go in his mouth. He may have oral input issues. Can they give him gum or do some positive reinforcements about coloring and not putting his fingers in his mouth?This was a huge issue with us also and it sounds like he is getting frustrated also. I am very concerned about the hitting issue--as well as how this is being approached by the aide. First, they just use hand sanitizer with Taylor--and they offer things to alternate with to put her in mouth. The therapist designed a necklace that, when she needs to have oral stimulation, she can take it and put it in her mouth. It has sensory (and fully safe) beads on it, and a special rope-necklace that stimulates her as she sucks on it. They also offer other oral stims--if they ran her into the bathroom every time she put her hands in her mouth, she would never be in class. (Same with Colin--he constantly sucks on his fingers, sometimes to the point of blisters). Even if she tapped him on the back (which could be perceived, by a child as hitting), that is wrong. I would call a meeting right away and voice your concerns. It might be best to keep them aware that, your son and you have communication going and, no matter what he says, you take it seriously. I would hate them to continue doing anything that makes him uncomfortable. Please keep us updated. ((hugs)) It has been a month or a bit more that Aiden started to talk about what is happening at school. It is still very little, but he tells me about his day. However, he lately has been refusing to do some work at school ( coloring - he hates that, he puts his fingers in his mouth very often and they make him to go to toilet to wash his hands  ). He came on Friday and told me that he cried at school. When I asked him why, he said that his aide hit him on the back.  I know she could be very strickt with him, but I know that he cannot lie, also I like his aide very much, she has child with autism as well, I do not think she really did that, but something obviously happened. When I asked him where did that happened, he said in the toilet when she took him to wash his hands. However I told her this morning what he told me, but I did that in a manner as not beleiving to my son, but just letting her know how he feels about it. Today, she put him back from reading level 8 to level 4, and was really arrogant towards me. I do not really care about reading levels, but she cannot just put him backwards that much. Also, in regards to his aide, she seems very nice, but she is very negative and pesimistic about any child with autism, and that is what sets me off. What should I do, I do not want to do something stupid. Maybe I should not tell her what Aiden told me. Please help...   ------------------------------------------------------------ ----- Mom2Aiden, 6 autism Why is the aide putting back his reading level at all...this is not her job, it is the teacher's job to evaluate the reading level.I really do not know why she put his reading level down... He can read really good, after today, I was confused and did not ask her about that. But yes, you are right that should be the theacher`s job. I third what Kelly said, I would call a meeting as soon as possible.  My son tends to over exaggerate say a tap on his leg, he would say they hit him.  I'm not saying that is what happened here but everytime my son tells me anything like that I call the person who runs the program (the paras report to another person at our school so in our case it wouldn't be the teacher) at the school and talk about it because they need to know that I am on top of it and that they are "being watched" to a degree and it has helped quite a bit.   Just my 2 cents, good luck! Leslie  I fourth Kelly's statement.  Even if it's simply a tap.  The aide should be the one person that understands that this bothers your child and should do everything possible to avoid this interaction.  I don't know if I'd replace the aide just yet since you seem to like her personality.  But I would make my feeling clear about the touching (whether it's hitting or tapping) and keep a very close eye on other reasons to pull away and have a more formal meeting. And I can't imagine having to drag my son to the bathroom every time he puts his fingers in his mouth.  We'd be there all day long.  If a child is looking for sensory input there are many ways for him to get this input rather than simply trying to detere him from these actions.  Kelly's necklace idea may be a good one. I have talked to his aide today. she said that she only tapped him on his back and realised that he did not liked it at all. She apologized to me... We talked about this issue of putting his fingers in his mouth. She tried to ignored for four days and on the fifth she decided to take him to the toilet to see if that works. Obviously not. It is a complitely new issue, we never have had this issue before, we think it is a only phase, and she will try with lollypops tomorrow to see if that could work. Honestly, I do not know what to think. In one hand I am happy that my child is able to tell me what has happened to him at school, and in other hand I am torn realising that school is not a happy place for him. He cried today when I came to pick him up, and was stressed. It is only four weeks left to the end of Kindy, I cannot wait. I am very teary as well... My son is always misinterpreting things like bumping in to him means you pushed him, or hit him or talking sternly means u are yelling at him and this causes a huge amount of stress for him and he cries about things like this all the time. Personally i wouldnt want an aide who has a bad attitude about autism working with my son AND the attitude she is giving u wouldnt fly either. I would request another aide. I also would think bumping him down would be something the teacher would do?  I hope things get worked out and your son gets an aide who understands and has faith in him. Good luck I'm so glad that she apologized to you and was nicer about it.  When things happen at my son's school (he was bullied in gym class earlier this year), that is all I think about until I have talked to someone who can do something about it.  Hang it there.
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