Constant Whining!! | Autism PDD
Home of Autism-PDD.net To Message Boards Site Map Free Autism Seminars

Constant Whining!!

Liam did this about 3 too.  It stopped pretty quickly too, he is normally pretty easy going so it drove us nuts that he was all whiny.  I also find he gets that way when he is sick or coming down with something.  I hope the stage is fast for you too. Yes, perhaps it is a combination of turning 3, and having a runny nose. I try my best to ignore, I even go to the furtherest room in the house (which isn't far, our house is tiny) and start working away, like he doesn't exhist. It is hard though b/c I've been programmed to encourage him to talk and give him what he wants when he makes the effort. So, I may be getting a tad manipulated ... must stop. Thanks for the replies. My kids haven't necessarily been very compliant, but for some lucky reason they never really discovered the whiny tone.  My NT nephew has a tendency to whine, though, and my sister tells him that grown-ups' ears can't hear whiney words.  If he uses a whiney tone, she reminds him and pretends she can't hear or understand a word he says, then praises him when he switches tone.  It works well for them, and might work for those who have trouble simply ignoring the behavior.

ignore the whining of course - but sometimes I think this is a developmental stage ahead - when they figure out they can control their lives

I would also make sure he was not sick or anything - my son always turns super clingy and tiresome when he is sick

OK, this is soo weird and happens from time to time. I WILL start a new thread on this but want to give this thread some continuity. The full moon is in recesssion tonight and ds has stopped whining.  Ds gets very off kilter about once every three-four months around a full moon. Not every month ... just enough for me to blame it. He has been back to his angel boy status today. Whining was minimal and when I told him to do something (get upstairs, drink your juice, get your feet off the table). He did it w/out question. Hmmmm, maybe he knew I posted about him

Seriously, ds has a lot of sensory issues, could the tug of the earth be involved from time to time? Gonna post new right now!

Whining drives me crazy!!  Sometimes Jair will get frustrated with Lia, and start whining/shrieking... I used to say, "Don't whine!  Stop whining!"  Lol  Finally, though, I have started demonstrating "whining," so he knows what I'm talking about.  I'll echo his whine very dramatically, loudly, until he's staring at me, then I'll say:"That's whining, and it hurts my ears.  Don't talk like that, don't whine.  Say it like this: ____." 

 Don't you think autistic kids think we parents are nuts sometimes, the way they look at us??  heehee

Don't just ignore whining.  Try to LOOK for opportunities to praise using a "happy voice" or "asking nicely" etc.  Heavily rewarding good behavior is a learned habit we parents must master. It's not that easy since most of us were raised having our screw-ups corrected and our good behavior ignored.  It really does help to reprogram ourselves to catch our kids doing what we WANT them to do.  Good luck.Make a concerted effort to COMPLETELY ignore the whining.  The INSTANT he uses a more appropriate tone, turn to him and say, "That is great asking.  I'm glad you stopped whining."  Then give him what he's asking for.  Kids learn quickly that whining gets attention. Adult brains are programmed to HATE whining and we learn that paying attention to our kids stops the whining. And THEY learn that they way to get attention is to whine.  It's really, really difficult to completely stop paying attention to this, which is why whining persists. I know this and still I can't completely stop paying attention to my son's whining, which is why he still does it at age 16.  I TRY. And I succeed to some degree.  Planned ignoring works if we can discipline ourselves ( and the others in the house) to ignore it.  Good luck.What has happened to my son? He used to go with the flow and make choices from options presented. In the last week or so (feels like a month), he has started whining at everything. It desn't matter what the objective is, he is fighting it. From simple things to brushing his teeth (he used to be very compliant and now refuses) to bigger no-nos which he always just listened to my calmly explaining why certain things are no-nos. If we need to go run an errand he will whine about the CAR we are driving (wants to go in the other one). Everything he asks for (praise God he is asking ... though) is at a high pitch whine followed by fake crying!! I'm going nuts ... what is going on? He's become sooooo difficult to please. BTW - he turns three tomorrow. Perhaps since he is PDD we are just now hitting the terrible twos? Please tell me I don't have a whole year of this. I know a lot of us have bigger issues and this seems small potatoes. Any help is appreciated!
 

Copyright Autism-PDD.net