Bath time/head washing trauma

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	Okay, I need some input here, we have been going through this HUGE bath time struggle, and I'm just not quite sure what to do... There are four issues, and by the end of what should be fun, I am totally stressed and just about ready to melt down right along with Korban. 1. Temperature!!! This is where the anxiety starts. He wants to feel the water temp over and over and over before getting in. It has to be lukewarm, which would be cold to most people for a bath, but any warmer and he cries hysterically in fear that it is too hot. It can't be too cold though, or he will refuse to sit down. 2. Showers...this is something that frustrates dh, but I just avoid it, choosing to pick my battles. He thinks the guys should just shower together, and I hear Korban panicking from the bathroom the whole time, not wanting to be under the running water. This, I am sure is a sensory/control issue, which is why I avoid it, but any input to make this process less stressful and more fun for both guys would be appreciated. 3. Shower head paranoia...Korban can't relax in the tub and play like other kids, because he just can't be distracted from staring at and talking nonstop about the shower head, repeating no shower please mommy in a shaky, scared voice, as if he is afraid it will come on at any second. 4. Hair washing, HATES IT! I know it is a necessary evil for cleanliness purposes, but he doesn't want water dumped on his hair, my best solution is that I have shaved his head, and wash it with a rag, asking for kisses over and over to keep his head back. STRESS!! Any suggestions/insight would be appreciated to make this a more enjoyable time for everyone. Oh, and if anyone tries to come in the bathroom during his bath, he screams for them to get out now!!!   The only thing I can suggest is to give him what ever control you are willing to. Let him "help" you run the water. Keep a towel handy to cover up the showerhead. Maybe out of sight, out of mind will help? As far as rinsing his hair, is he willing to tip his head back and "help" pour the water to rinse his hair? Or maybe lay him on the counter with a towel under his head and wash his hair in the sink. Just trying to throw some ideas out there. I know giving my 6 yo some control, where I am willing to pick the battles, helps so much! We had similar problem with ds.  He eventually got over it, thank goodness.  There is one thing you can use to wash his hair temporarily, it is a no rinse shampoo, they use it on invalids and bedridden patients.  All you do is put some in hair, rub it into hair like regular shampoo and then towel dry, no water is needed.  I must say it does work pretty well, and it may give him the time he needs to get over his fear.  While you use it, just keep letting him play in water, maybe give him a cup to rinse his legs with.  Dont know if this will help but it is worth a shot.  The no rinse shampoo should be available at any store that sells toiletries.  Good luck A    9/93 NT B    9/00   NT C    7/02   ASD Mommy I like the hiding the shower head idea. I really want this to be a fun time for him!
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