it gets easier, right?
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I know it goes in phases with all kids and sometimes are easier than others but I've had a rough week. Field trip earlier this week didn't go as well as I had hoped and today was kind of a bust. We went to the arboreteum and it was so crowded! They have a fantastic kids area with tiny streams you can walk in, getting your feet wet and climbing on rocks etc. He was having so much fun but every time we tried to go from one thing to the next it was screaming and crying. He's usually much better about transitions so maybe it was just overload, it was quite crowded. I wish it was easier to take them places, I get jealous seeing parents of typical kids where the kids might whine a bit but don't meltdown when they are out. Does this get easier as they get older. My son is quite hf. I hope it gets easier to go places, it can be so fun when it goes right. He is totally happy and I'm sure he had a good time but I wish I had Sorry you had such a rough week. You can read my posts and see I have these horrible days and then something really great will happen ... I think we have to roll with the bad days, try to forget them quickly, and really celebrate the good ones. I'm sorry you had such a rough week....I hope better times come your way real soon"I hope tomorrow you find better days"~ this is a lyric from a song that I kind of remember from childhood. Sarah loves pump it up! The meltdowns will get fewer as he gets older and learns more coping skills ...we have earplugs at all times just in case of emergency:) Sometimes it gets easier. Sometimes it gets harder (hard to believe, but true). Mostly, it just gets different. My son is fifteen, and he's gotten so much better than he gets embarrassed acting strange in public. He would never break down in front of anyone else. He acts very appropriate in public now. He can pass for a typical kid in front of others. I can only speak for my own child, but we've come so far it's not funny. He used to scream in public and throw himself on the ground. It's been years since he's done that. We did have him in intensive interventions from an early age. I think that's the ticket. He is not on medication or a diet.I've had a tough week w/my dd also. Funny how when things go well you can be on top of the world, but all that is forgotten so quickly when there's a bad week. It can feel like things will never be good again! But they will...... Hope it gets better for you soon....this was a good reminder for me too! Some things do get easier. My son at 11 does have the meltdowns he did at 3, but when he does have them now, it's harder to deal with. Things will be going along great and then out of nowhere a meltdown or something happens and it floors me. I just keep repeating the first verse of the "have you ever seen the rain song" Someone told me long ago
We started having "our week" on Saturday. It is six days before my "time of the month". I've posted about this before - my son seems to react to my hormone levels before anyone else in the house notices it. Also, the change in temperatures seems to affect him as well. We had cold weather last week, then Saturday was gorgeous and then Sunday was COLD. Snoop- that is fascinating about the hormone thing....our kids are pretty darn amazing! I never thought it would get better...years ago. His tantrums aren't a daily thing (3 or more a day) but now at the age of 11 they sure are more intense. Jesse tends to let things build until he explodes then its about every past grievance he has ever had since the last meltdown and then some. Its been a struggle to help him and I think he is suffering from some depression, the Psych said that is common for kids like him. As if he doesn't have enough to deal with.I think overall it gets easier...or maybe its that we get better at adapting and going with the flow of it all. I am sorry it was so rough for you.  The meltdown probably resulted from over simulation. I took my son to the Smithsonian, talk about over stimulation! My sister and I took our six kids (1 x Autism and 1 x PDD-NOS). One thing that really saved me since then is that Shawn has an MP3 player. We don't leave home without it now (except school). When it gets too noisy for him he can put his head phones on and tune the world out on his terms. It has made a huge difference. He has his bad days, but I try very hard to focus on his good days. He is such a blessing, but it can be difficult to remember that when he has a meltdown. It never gets easier...just different. You learn to adjust and understand...that is what makes coping easier. I'm going to be real honest about my experiences right now. It is harder than it was when he was little. I never in a million years thought that would have been possible and I was not even a little bit prepared for it. It is so different, and I find myself wishing I could go back to when he was 3 and 4, non-verbal and melting down constantly. At 11 (almost 12) not only are we dealing with autism, but we are dealing with puberty, hormones, trying to be independent but still can't on some things, lack of social skills and all that entails, coming to terms with the fact that he has autism (that is not going well), not wanting to be different and trying so hard not to be, anxiety and more anxiety. I really wish someone would have told me this was coming a long time ago or at least that it was a possibility. I wish I had made more of a push for services when he was doing so well in early elementary school. I thought he was getting better, outgrowing things, etc. and didn't need as many interventions. Hindsight being 20/20 that was the time to really push for intensive training on social and anxiety issues. Now I'm behind the 8 ball and running real short on time and not only am I getting resistance from school but from him as well. I wish like anything that I had been more proactive and not become complacent. I am going through a lot of guilt about that right now. Obviously, this is not going to be everyone's experience but I just wish I had been a little better prepared for this time. I understand your issues with your child getting older and harder to deal with. My son is 11, but we did not have any EI because he was not DX until 2 years ago. He knows he is "different" and he does not like it. One way that I have tried to explain it to him (he asked point blank about it) is to give him specific examples using himself as the model. For example, instead of reciting a list of symptoms I say "You know how you get so focused on your origami? That is one of the symptoms. You know how you have a difficult time adjusting to a change in your schedule? That is one of the symptoms." I try to make sure that I never say anything about his DX that is negative. There is nothing "wrong" with him...just different. It does not make it "easier", but it helps me cope when I focus on educating myself and finding ways to help him adjust to the changes.
God Bless I beleive that thigs do get better - we also get smarter and that in itself makes us more equipped Tomorrow is another day |
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