OCD with shoe laces!?
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| My six year old is always staring at his shoe laces. He makes me retie them
until they are perfect in his eyes. He also does this with the strings in his pants, We have to tuck them into his pants so he doesn't worry about it. Does anyone else have this problem with their child?Elastic fits our kids best cause of their skinny ness. Yes Daniel does the string thing. Yes Daniel did the shoe lace thing also. I think this is cause of Daniel's visual dysfunction issue. My son only did this kind of fussing with his favorite Bionicle. He wouldn't play with it, he'd pose it down to millimeter precision. This was when he was 7. Now he plays normally with them. We don't use shoes with laces, but I wonder if your son's obsession with them could be related to strong or undesirable reactions from other adults. Like, "stop! your shoelace is untied! you might trip!" -- the loud voice and urgency might be something he thinks he can avoid by controlling his shoe laces. If you haven't read Stickboy's post on these types of fear reactions, here's the link: http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18152&am p;KW=phobias Good luck dealing with this. Thanks for the great advice  They both make sense. I JUST wish I could
help him ease whatever he is feeling. Today he went to his father to tie his shoes because I couldn't get it right. He told me, "It just makes my brain feel weird"  My son refuses to even wear shoes with laces. He just hates them. Velcro
only. won't even try on shoes with laces. "it makes my brain feel weird" definitely sounds OCD to me. My oldest has said things like that when he has to do things a certain way. My next question is Do I buy him shoes without laces? Or will he start to focus on something else? I know in first grade we were told to have our children wear shoe laces so they can learn to tie them and this is where I get confused  because I don't know if he has to overcome his issues by
working through the fustration or is it to over welming and thats not how he will learn?? I am not sure if there is a right from wrong but if someone can answer that, it would be great I have some sensory issues and always had them as a child especially with shoe laces. I always wanted my laces tied really tight. Does your DS want his laces tied really tight or loose?Do you think he has a sensory issue with the laces of his shoes or do you think it's purely visual? MyDs likes the laces tight and he also uses loose laces as a way to delay doing things he doesn't want to do. He will often untie them when he thinks I am not looking and then ask for them to be tied. I then double tie them to sabotage him and he then stops.Maybe in this day and age of velcro straps, slip ons, and other shoe developments,...learning how to tie shoes is an unecessary skill from the past. Really, I thought about my own shoes, and the one's in his Dad's closet-- and truthfully, there doesn't seem to be so much of a need to master or accept shoelaces anymore. Just sayin' 
Sneakers, dress shoes, boots, sport specific shoes, are all available without laces. Perhaps we are stuck in the past. Kind of like we really can live now without perfect penmanship. You know? Fine motor skills are important, but perhaps the areas they are important in have changed drastically. I don't really care if J ever makes peace with laces. (That's just me picking battles)
Edited to add: OCD tendencies will always pop up here and there (believe me, I know  . J is very anxious and OCD.) I'm not sure it's true,
though if you give in on one thing--like forgetting about laces for now-- that another thing will "replace it". I feel like "replacements" and new obsessions just happen on their own. momof2 -- Since the teacher has told the parents to buy lace-up shoes, if your son doesn't have them, he'll really stand up. Of course, if he fusses about or is distracted by his shoelaces all the time, he'll stand out, too. My kids wear velcro shoes and slip-on shoes, and I actually planned on working on shoe tying earlier this year but haven't gotten around to it. To anyone who's looking for tips on how to teach shoe tying skills, you'll find lots of ideas and resources under this topic on our forum: http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18534&am p;KW=shoes&PN=0&TPN=2 Good luck with everything. Thanks for all your help He does not like his shoes to slide on his heals
when he runs so maybe it is sensory and visual. I guess I shouldn't sweat the small stuff. It is just hard when I see him getting fusturated with the small stuff  Thanks again you guys are great!!! |
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