If you do a search on here for meltdowns, you'll find a LOOOOONG post on it. One of our members who is autistic started it, giving lots of great insight. And then, there are links & lots of q's & a's. There's another post or 2 by NorwayMom with tons of links on meltdowns & behaviors.
What has helped me, a realization made here after reading those insightful posts, is this: for the most part (if not all), my dd cannot control her meltdowns, cannot stop them, and we can't always predict what will set her off. I remind myself during her fits, try to take deep breaths, and often just go into some form of autopilot. She is not just a bratty kid, going off...and I can't imagine what she must feel during them.
There are days where if you look at her, she will meltdown. Some days, it's a certain word. Other times, it's sensory overload. Often, it's when she has an idea or plan in her mind, and is unable to follow through on it. We have tried some preemptive things like visual schedules & routines, social stories, & sensory integration. We have ensured that there is nothing heavy that she can pull down or get hurt with etc. in her room. When she has a meltdown, often she will scurry there when it first starts--or we take her there. Sometimes, we hold her close & rock her--if she allows it. If she wants nothing to do with us, we stand in the hall & just make sure she is okay (as ok as one can be during a meltdown), I've been known to listen to my iPod during them (can last up to 45 mins). Often, afterwards, she is in her own world & will enjoy watching a video.
The professionals have given me less help then what I've been able to find here, so I am really glad you found this forum. I hope it gives you the same support & ideas as I receive.
Also, welcome. Wow, we have yet another girl (there's a recent post on all the girls here--surprising given the statistics!).
We are still working on this with my son...we are trying to teach him calming mechanisms...we have been giving him a squishy ball to squeeze. I think the best thing for us is to try to prevent them before they happen, but sometimes that feels hopeless to.
We are using a lot of visuals with Mason. when we see him start to get upset we tell him to "use his words." because his first instinct is to flop on the floor and cry. We do a lot of sensory things with him...it's helping some, but we still have a long way to go!
Sounds like your dd is seeking sensory from the things you mentioned...does she have an OTand sensory diet? These things are something I would bring up with them to see if they have any suggestions...also I'm reading the book "Out of Sync Child," right now...I've heard a lot of people mention it on this board, and so far it's been an interesting and helpful book...might want to check that out.
Good luck and welcome to the board.
I think this is the topic that Elle22 was referring to, along with a similar one about how fears can start:
http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=16187&am p;am p;am p;KW=inside+scoop - " 'Meltdowns': The inside scoop (or rant)" which is a popular topic on our forum started by Stickboy26.
http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18152&am p;KW=phobias
I have learned that tantrums/meltdowns aren't really instant. They're the result of cumulative stress. Everybody is capable of losing control if they get too stressed, but people with autism have unusual sources of chronic stress, so they're more susceptible to meltdowns. Sleep problems, communication problems, sensory issues, and the demands of home and school are some of those stressors. Then some small disappointment or frustration (like not being able to buy something at the store), will be the straw that broke the camel's back and meltdown happens.
The following topic on our forum has resources that have helped other mothers identify the behavioral signals that show their children are headed towards meltdown, and helped them know what to do to head off a meltdown, or prevent it from getting out of control. Really useful stuff.
http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17134&am p;KW=meltdown+resources
If you don't have an occupational therapist on your child's team, you might want to do this checklist to identify your child's sensory issues. This will help you understand what's stressful for her, and how she deals with stress through sensory-seeking self-stimulation (like flicking lights).
http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/sensory-processin g-disorder-checklist.html
At our house, coming up with a meltdown plan and identifying our son's sensory issues made a big positive impact on our day-to-day existence. I hope it helps you too.
Good luck with everything, and welcome to the forum.
Just wanted to add that you're not a horrible mom! No one was born knowing how to deal with autism, and you're doing your best, and have clearly spent time observing your child. That makes you a great mom!
Autism sucks. Plain and simple. Our kids and WE have to put up with all kinds of behavioral issues. But, remember, behavior is communication. I've BTDT for 16 years. My son is dx'd with PDD-NOS and hearing impairment. He's given me and my husband a run for our money A LOT. What we've found that works are positive behavior plans, leaning on his visual sense (he reads, so that's a blessing), sensory integration therapy and drugs. He's on a combination of meds but the most important one is Risperdal.
Your school system in Canada is different from ours so I can't advise you about how to get intervention for your daughter, but she sure sounds as though she'd benefit from intense ABA therapy.
I'm not sure where to begin...my 6 year old daughter has autism spectrum disorder, it was diagnosed back in early February of this year - and lately her "nuclear meltdowns" have been increasing, and getting much worse - and so has her other symptoms (flicking lights, pulling her hair, rocking, her "rocks", not sleeping right, fear of loud noises etc) My husband and I are at our wit's end - the truth is, right now I feel like a horrible mother, becuase I am being reduced to a shrieking maniac...I just don't know what to do....any suggestions? does anyone else experience these instant tantrums?
I experienced a nuclear meltdown of a tantrum today at the psychotherapist. We had to stop our session it was so bad and I would up carrying out a kicking and screaming 5 year old. It was horrible....... I actually cried from the stress overload this afternoon. My face is breaking out terrible from all the stress.