Thank you SO much for that reminder! We should all try to remember that, I was just feeling like a failure today and your post really helped. Thanks :)Just wanted to pop in & say that I couldn't sleep last night so i stayed up most of the night reading an amazing book called The Mommy Myth.
http://www.amazon.com/Mommy-Myth-Idealization-Motherhood-Und ermined/dp/0743259998
It made me realize where a lot of this pressure on mothers of children with special needs comes from. The Mom is ALWAYS the one to blame, so we put all this pressure on ourselves to make sure we do everything PERFECTLY. Add to the mix a child with Autism & you get even more pressure! I just wanted to remind all of you moms that you are doing a great job (and Dads too). It is NOT your fault that your child has Autism. It is not your fault if your child isn't talking yet. It is not your fault if you haven't spent every waking moment working on their challenges, cooking special foods, ect ect. Is it important to work as hard as you can? Of course. But I am really going to try to remember that I am only human, I can only accomplish so much in my life, and if my child is not as successful as I had hoped it is not because I failed miserably as a parent. I would really recommend this book to all moms. It really showcases attempts by the media and popular culture to make a mother feel like no matter what they do, it isn't enough. They have to raise kids, keep a house like Martha Stewart, and be expected to wear little black dresses and have their hair & make up perfect like celebrity moms. I think it is a lot of this "stuff" that has contributed to an even more overwhelming experience raising a child with special needs. Anyway I hope you all read the book.There is another book quite like this - Perfect Madness - which was also really interesting
Yes, I agree that women are under TREMENDOUS pressure. I've had to stop reading certain women's magazines because they just make me feel bad for not being perfect in every way.
I believe super super strongly that sleep problems and eating difficulties are not the parents fault. Some children are susceptible to these problems, and it wouldn't have mattered if you followed this or that expert advice, so don't feel guilty about muddling through the best you could.
Thanks for posting about this important topic and interesting book.