How to handle the little things? | Autism PDD

Hey Rachelle, You said you have a good relationship with the school which is such a HUGE PLUS right there! Have you had a chance to actually meet the teacher and aide and talk to them one on one yet to discuss your concerns for Julian?

What I have done in the past is write down a list of all the little thngs that you know they need to have specifically or that will set them off... (example maybe your kid INSISTS to put on their boots BEFORE their coat and a teacher forcing them to put the coat on and THEN the boot will send him into meltdown.... a pencil HAVING to be sharp AND have an eraser... otherwise a dull pencil with an eraser or and sharp pencil with no eraser would be WRONG and case a meltdown... etc .. His Needing to have the tray with the milk but no other food on it (my son would throw the tray if it had other food on it out of disgust

Good Luck!

I hope all the kids starting school have an awesome year!

Great ideas from Michelle & Tammy...and so true that the school relationship is invaluable, and if you can get them to go through the routine of lunchtime it'll really really help. Riley still doesn't have an aide, we're still working on it...and his first year of full-days he'd pull his lunchbag off the cart and throw it in the garbage. Three weeks went by before anyone figured it out...so check up, check-up, check-up!!!! They only figured it out because I kept calling saying I don't think he's eating!! (He still won't drink at school even 3 years later because "I only drink milk at home")

Good luck to all you starting school!!
~Lesley

I agree with Michelle and Tammy also, another thing you can do that worked well for me and my sons teacher was sending notes back and forth I would send one saying what time he went to bed and how he acted in the evening , I would also write what happened in the morning before school weather or not he had any meltdowns any aggression so on so forth. I would also tell about any changes or new things we had done that might affect him. For example when summer came and it was time to wear shorts he had a fit he hated shorts it took me 1/2 an hour to get them on him to go to school so I wrote about it to his teacher so her and the aides in his class all made a huge deal out of his shorts telling him how nice they were and what a big boy he was wearing shorts. I never had another problem getting him in shorts again!!! So the key is to keep open communication and tell them what things might set him off so they are aware and know what to do. Hope this helps some!! Hang in there you will be surprised how well he may adjust to school!

Nita

My suggestion would be to see if you could have walk thru's on the lunch routine before he actually started school. Maybe the teacher could have visual or verbal daily remembers for awhile on what he will go thru in the lunchroom. I know with Jeffrey it got to a point where we could not let him see the lunch menu's they make up a month ahead of time. Sometimes they had what was printed, sometimes not. Could you imagine going to a McDonald's and them not having what is printed on the menu? Hopefully you and the teacher will be on the same page with this issue.

Tammy

My 4 year old dd started mainstream kindergarten 2 weeks ago and things are going amazingly well. She does have a one on one skills trainer, but she is sitting back and letting the friendships develop and considering Kate isn't the most verbal child in the word..it is working. She has a couple of girl friends that she plays with during recess and there is one big "little" guy who has decided that he likes my daughter and stands up for her if the other boys are being mean. As long as there is a group to follow, she will go with the flow. She is still having adjustment problems (licking her feet or shoes, acting agressive to kids who won't play with her), but they are getting less and I guess not weird enough for the other kids to avoid her like the plague. Remember, all the kids are new and nervous. There were tons of poorly behaved screaming children and not one of them was my child. Truly!! Not too sure what the teacher thinks about it. She decided that she needs to learn more about autism. Which is a good thing, but made me wonder what my child had done. I will be thinking about and praying for all you moms of new kindergartners. I am sure that the kiddos will do great.

Aloha, Renee

Thanks! LOL We thought Julian was to be a "JULIET"... When we found out we had a boy comming, we decided on Julian Grae. I wanted Julian Ozbourne, but DH wasn't as into that as I was...LOL I still have a couple of things to make ready, but so far everything is going well. He loves school so I think he will be ok. I worry that kids will pick on him. If they did, he may not even notice because he may think they are trying to play with him. Ok I need to quit thinking about this or I'm gonna have to get those meds...my baby starts mainstream kindergarten in two weeks and i think i'm about to have a heart attack. i have the same worries about the little things. what if she doesnt like the kids? what if her shoes come untied? what if i sent her to school expecting her to eat a hot lunch when she really wants a cold lunch? what if she wants another child's snack?

i have a great relationship with her teachers and they all assure me that she'll be just fine. but its normal for us to have these anxieties. the teachers have told me that they'd be worried if i WASNT nerve-wracked about my baby starting school lol!

what has helped me so far is making sure all her school supplies are ready to go. i have a bag full of stuff that she needs for school. i have gone through the bag with a list over and over and over again. every day i check it to make sure everything is there. school isnt for two whole weeks yet! lol! but it temporarily makes me feel like everything is organized and ready, so then i feel ready. it helps, just a little.
oh, and one more thing. i LOVE the name Julian!!!! it was my first choice for my baby, if i had a boy. Sunny38579.8807175926

Ok I am in a panic! Julian starts mainstream kinder on monday and will only have someone shadow him for a bit. He will have only 2 hours of social skills and speech with the resource class a day. So, I know he can handle it academically, but what to do about the little things? Heres an example:

Lunch time. He wants a tray with milk, mostly cause he wants milk and he's very used to getting a tray for breakfast. Now, he is too picky to eat the lunch at school so I will have to pack a lunch of probably 2 pieces of dry toast, a cereal bar and fruit snacks EVERY DAY. But, how will he adapt to the fact that in line he will only be getting a milk and not a tray, even though he really does NOT want the food on the tray, just the repetetive habbit of GETTING A TRAY? And I still don't know who and when he will be shadowd and how that will work out. I am seriously going to hork because of stress over the little issues he has. I have to say that I have made a lot of friends at his school and they all love Julian very much and really I don't have to worry so much. LOL The principal called today because of my dd. She is supposed to be starting PPCD and NO ARD YET! I HATE the person who is temporarily in charge of her case, so I called and told them if I didn't have my ARD this week I was going to contact an attorney. I am at my witts end on this one. Anyway, the principal happens to be good friends with us and he is like, "you're gonna call an attorney?" I was like, "Troy, I am under a huge amount of stress here! I do not like the case manager and she is rude so I had to get nasty!" He was very good about it actually and he does try to get things done. Hell, at my dh's reunion (yes they were high school buds) I told him now that he is the superintendent, the new principal would be calling him to say, "It's that damn Hernandez woman AGAIN!" LOL

Ok anyhoo, what do I do besides self medicating to help Julian suceed?

luv,

Rachelle