I don't like that Abbie's teacher seems so unwilling to communicate unless it's "bad." I have learned very early that communication is the best thing to have, even with my NT children! I might really consider having that put into her IEP...in our experience we didn't have it in Mason's IEP last year and they were well into October before his teacher contacted me that things weren't going quite as well as I thought...I would make a phone call here and a note there and would always get "he's fine." Imagine my shock when she calls me and says "well for the past month Mason has been struggling..."
Good luck--hope the girls are doing well and enjoying kindergarten!
Sadly some staff only contact mom when something goes wrong. Here their is 0 communication with parent's until something goes wrong. JR.high!
I bet Hs will be the same way. Daughter Dara
See I have found it to be the opposite. The younger teachers seem to be more terse and less willing to do things like that, and the older ones more willing to try to let us parents know what's going on. Maybe cause most of them are parents themselves? Course I have limited experience but that's what I've seen so far. I am going through that too, 2 different teachers, 2 different curriculms to keep up with, 2 different styles, and I already prefer ones to the others! One is older though I wouldn't call either young, but she has 9 ASD kiddos and one aide, and I know it is crazy in her room. I like the detailed notes she writes but she is actually less organized than Andrew's teacher. Andrew's teacher uses detailed sheets already filled out where she circles things but I don't get as many personal notes and I do like that, it gives me a better picture of what their day was like. But both have been doing this for many many years and the reports are much better than what I got last year from the first year teacher, much more detailed and much more willing to try things. She didn't know much about ASD and she wasn't willing to bend much. I do like them being in different rooms, I stopped short of different schools. That would be really hectic. I do not like that teachers response though, maybe there does need to be a meeting of some sort or a compromise and progress reports every few weeks or something.Can you get it written into the IEP that communication will be sent home daily? Maybe call a meeting after school gets going and visit this issue.Thanks folks - the girls do have an IEP and the teacher's are aware of their DX. I am willing to cut them some slack because they have a lot of kids in the regular class and the communication thing isn't in the IEP, but if Evie's teacher keeps the info coming home and Abbie's is stubborn, then I'll need to bring it up in the IEP meeting. I just hope this teacher isn't annoyed to have a special needs kid in her class. Abbie is the more challenging of the two, at least at the beginning of the year.May I ask whether Abbie volunteers information about her day or whether you have to prise it out of her? If the latter then some sort of correspondence might be in order, but bear in mind it doesn't mean the teacher will notice everything.
She'll volunteer some things but mostly I have to pry it out of her. She just has a hard time speaking about past events (they both do). I get tidbits of information about their day (like, the teacher had spaghetti for lunch of Aidan had a Little Einsteins lunch box or they took a nap on their towels or they colored in the library) - but I don't get a narrative. Actually, my son really doesn't get into too much detail about his day, either.
I rarely volunteered information either, even when it was in my interests to do so. My teacher when I was 6 used to make me read instead of doing maths and the only way my parents found out was because another girl told her parents.
Mind you, sometimes I'd volunteer stuff I shouldn't have. In the same year my older sister dropped her cornbeef sandwiches and when the dinner lady asked who'd done it I panicked and said it was me (iI didn't even have cornbeef sandwiches). I was hauled off to the teacher and made to sit in at dinnertime writing a few lines
I still can't volunteer a lot of things, but I've learnt that if it's really important I can write things down.
um- i work in a school- if a communication notebook is on the iep- the teacher HAS to do it- like it or not.
The teacher might not have meant it as tersely as it sounded. I suspect that she doesn't have much time to write notes (or do journals), which I certainly understand but it really doesn't help.
We used a notebook journal in first and second grade, and we found that we really didn't get an accurate picture of how our son was doing in school because the teachers didn't have much time to write. In third grade, my son's assistant and special ed teacher had more time to chat at drop off and pick up, and that worked much better for everyone.
If she doesn't do journals, I'd at least ask for a post-transition meeting after max 1 month of school, and ask for extra parent-teacher conferences throughout the year. The thing is, you're not asking for feedback just out of curiosity. Some teachers don't seem to understand that you can make their job easier if you just know what lessons you need to reinforce at home.
Here's a topic with my links on school-home communication. Good luck with everything.
http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=19561&am p;KW=communication
Fred, I don't know where you live but here in Florida we have a homeschool notebook that goes home with the child everyday and is to be signed by the parent and it is a means of communication. In the folder the behavior for the day is notated by a color code, (white for great day-yellow for had to be reminded of something- and so forth). Also there is room for comments from the teacher and comments from the parent as well. Of course, it is limited space. Can you imagine having to daily chart all the observations of every child in the classroom and send it home to each parent? But, you can certainly get the just of how their behavior is and if there were possibly any problems. Do they atleast get a behavior rating chart sent home everyday? If not, I would be concerned to. If they do, then what we do is try to have a conference once a quarter with the teacher and address any issues then. (Unless there are immediate urgent things that need to be addressed, I do not wait for those). It is hard to let go of our little ones, especially when they have special needs, but unless we are willing to homeschool them, we must! You seem to be such a great Father and so on top of your girls needs that I think you should be able to relax a little bit and trust not only your intstincts about the people who are taking care of your children when you are not there, but trust your judgment about how things are going and if something doesn't feel right, you know you won't stand by and not handle it. It is hard though!When C was in special ed preschool, the teacher did a journal. Now in special ed 1st grade, the teacher does a journal. However, in mainstream kindy there was a "sheet" that came home each day. His aide and therpists would fill it out. It basically had 3 columns: Activity, Level of Independence, Comments
I'd get things like: Math, Moderate, Got frustrated when got stuck on a problem and protested when redirected but eventually finished the assignment with support.
I think that for kids on an IEP, and who have communication challenges, that it is appropriate to request something to come home each day. If nothing else, the teacher should give you a short list of activities done in class so that you can have something for you to use to prompt the girls to tell you about their day. That was what I found most helpful about C's sheet. If I saw "assembly" on there as an activity, I'd ask C about it.
Well, it's great that we seperated the girls for kindergarten, but now we have two teachers to stay on top of. We requested (in writing) daily communication from both (these are regular ed teachers with regular classes, so maybe that's a bit much to ask, I don't know).
Evie's teacher reported that Evie is being very social and interacting with the kids at her table, and other than talking out of turn and making an occasionally distracting amount of noise (which she said is to be expected at her age), is doing really well.
Abigail's teacher sent home a terse note that said"
"I don't do journals! If no note comes home, that means that all is well."
good luck with this one
Welcome to school with twins!!!!
My twin nieces are just entering their senior year of high school and I've been listening to my SIL complain for 13 years about stuff like this. Many times over the years she would vastly prefer the way that one twin's teacher did stuff over the other one. Sometimes one would have tons of homework and the other hardly any. Sometimes one would get cool, creative projects and the other would get boring ditto sheets with problems on them. Once the kids got older, the differences became obvious to them and there was a lot of "it's not fair" type of drama.
We just started getting a taste of this last year. R's teacher was very quiet and organized. C's teacher was very extroverted and chaotic. R would get an assignment, then 2 days later C would get the same. R's teacher sent home notification of field trips a month before, C's teacher days before. Just totally different styles (and to this day we think the placements were backward - R should have had C's teacher and C should have had R's teacher).
Now this year it's a whole different level of craziness with the boys at 2 different schools. Now, in addition to totally different curriculums, they have totally different schedules. Major holidays and breaks are in sync, but R will have a half-day for teacher institute on a Tuesday, and then C will have a half-day follwing Thursday. C gets door to door transportation, R catches the bus on the corner. They leave at different times in the morning but get home at the same time. It's nuts!
I think we both need to be prepared to deal with the same sort of frustration my SIL has had over the years, and recognize that it will only get worse once the kids become cognizant of any disparities!
Yikes!
Fred, do the girls still have an IEP or are they "working without a net"?
Does she (the teacher) know about the girls dx? Maybe you need a face to face meeting with the teacher.