social story re: strangers | Autism PDD

Hi all,

Does anyone know of a book that presents the idea of strangers to toddlers? We want to discourage overly friendly behavior toward strangers and explain the difference between how we behave toward people we know and those who we don't.

Thanks very much.

Thanks for the great replies.i make social storiesI also use the "I am Your mommy." My daughter just used to think that every Man was a Daddy and every Woman was a Mommy.

I show my daughter the safe houses and people that she can go to in my neighborhood.

I make her look for cars and tell us when it is safe to cross the street. She finally gets this!

I show her the safe places like the Fire Station, Police Officers, and the schools.

You could make a book with photos of close family/friends, and cut-outs of
people from magazines/catalogues.

When my kids and I are pulling a social skill from a book, I've noticed that
they don't always get the full transfer. If the character is a bunny, and the
stranger is a hippo, they get the message that if they see a hippo, it's a
stranger. Or they focus on a physical trait of the "stranger" and think that's
what makes them "a stranger." Did that make sense? Anyway, I stay as
close to real-life examples as possible.

Where we live, it's more likely that our kids will need help from a stranger rather than get hurt by a stranger, so I try to be careful not to build up a fear reaction. We do talk about strangers, but I've put more effort into getting them to think about who they can go to for help in a given situation (for example, in a store, look for someone who works there; on the playground, look for a teacher in a reflective vest, even if you do not know that teacher, etc).

Here are my resources on stranger danger. Some might not be appropriate until your child gets older.

Social stories:

http://www.cheri.com.au/PDF_Files/professionals/Whatisasocia lstory.pdf - short social story on page 4 about who to talk to at the store (only to people we know, like mom and dad, and we can say hello and thank you to the cashier)

http://www.pent.ca.gov/05PosEnvInt/dIndividual/strangersocst ory.doc - social story with pictures that introduces the concept of "safe strangers" like emergency personnel.

Social circles:

This website explains the concept of social circles. I've heard of color coding them so family gets the green light, acquaintances a yellow light, and strangers a red stop light.

http://www.autism-help.org/communication-social-circles-auti sm.htm

Video to purchase:

You can see a trailer for the Safe Side video here:

www.thesafeside.com

The video includes 7 "hot tips for cool kids".

1. Keep your Safe Side Adult close.

2. Don’t open the door!

3. Beware of tricks.

4. Don’t Know? Don’t talk.

5. Create a Safe Side Circle.

6. Know your Safe Side Adults.

7. Don’t go without asking.

Related topics on our forum:

http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=16217&am p;KW=stranger+danger

http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18156&am p;KW=www%2Ethesafeside%2Ecom&PN=0&TPN=2

Good luck with everything.

I bought the book Don't Talk to Strangers by Kevi. My son's preschool teacher used it in her classroom and all the kids loved it. It comes with a CD...it's set to rap music. It was hilarious watching this preschool class get up and dance to the music...and they definitely picked up the chorus (Don't talk to strangers in the park, in a car, etc) quickly.

We have "The Berenstain Bears Learn About Strangers." There is quite a bit of text on each page, so I'm not sure if it's what you would be looking for.

http://www.amazon.com/Berenstain-Bears-Learn-About-Strangers /dp/0394873343/ref=pd_bbs_2/102-5041726-7637757?ie=UTF8& s=books&qid=1188438763&sr=8-2

There is also a Winnie the Pooh book called "Don't Talk To Strangers Pooh."

http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Talk-Strangers-First-Winnie/dp/07 86831456/ref=sr_1_10/102-5041726-7637757?ie=UTF8&s=books &qid=1188439115&sr=8-10

I read an interesting article about "stranger danger" one day in the doctor's office. I think it was in Newsweek but I can't recall. The article talked about how we shouldn't really empahize "strangers" to kids because they process the term differently than adults. To children, a stranger is someone they have never seen before in their lives. To adults, a stranger is someone we don't know personally (but may have seen many times.) I don't think my kids would consider our garbage man a stranger, they've seen him every Thursday since they were born. Or the mailman, or the UPS guy, or our landscapers, or the contractors that put on our addition, or my neighbors 20-something son that lives in his basement. These folks are all familiar faces in our lives but I still wouldn't want my kids going off in a car with any of them!

The article emphasized how instead of saying "never take candy from a stranger" you should say "never take candy from ANYONE without asking mommy or daddy first." Or "never get in a car with anyone unless mommy and daddy says it's ok first." And if someone approaches your child they should say "I have to go get my mom."

I actually tested this with my NT son. A woman we'd never seen before walked down our street with her dog and I asked my son if she was a stranger and he said "yes, I've never seen her before." Then later when the mailman came and I asked if he was a stranger my son said (rolling his eyes and looking at me like I'm stupid) "geez mom, it's the mailman, the same one that comes every day."

So we really don't talk to our kids about "strangers" at all. We just talk about certain rules such as we don't open the front door to anyone without asking mommy or daddy first, we never get in a car with anyone without asking mommy or daddy first, we never take anything from anyone without asking mommy and daddy first, etc.