The obsessions are driving me crazy... | Autism PDD

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For us, it was handwashing and bathing, poison and poop. It started after Sam's little bro was born, and I think it was in response to everyone telling Sam how messy babies are, talking about diapers etc...Things esculated to the point that everyone HAD to wash their hands after touching the baby and before touching Sam or any of his belongings. He was washing 100 times a day and trying to take 3-5 baths/day and making us wash and it just wasn't getting better. He was having major meltdowns at the thought of poisons, and had stopped wiping himself after a BM for fear of getting poop on his hands. The more we tried re-direction, logic, begging, and  straight out refusal, the more time Sam spent trying to get clean. It took me months to realize that I was asking for something that Sam couldn't do in his current mind-set (pre-DX) What I ended up doing was reassuring Sam that I never wanted him to feel unsafe and I was willing to do WHATEVER he needed to get back that feeling of being safe. Every time he demanded I wash I would do it with a huge smile on my face, pointing out that I would do anything for his sense of safety. Everytime he asked me to wipe him, I did, telling him that I would do it for as long as he needed to feel ready to do it himself again. I basically surounded him with the sense that his fears were just as important to me as to him and I was on the same team as him. Sam's anxiety decreased dramatically after that and about a year later this set of obsessions disappeared. Two years later, I can't get him in the tub without a bunch of good-hearted nagging.

My experience with Sam and with some of the ASD kids I worked with long ago is that it doesn't really work to *shut down* the behavour, you need to work with it to work through it. OK- that doesn't sound very clear. An example that comes to mind is a 5 yr old Aspie I worked with many years ago who had a thing about the letters n and u - known as "bear cave" and "upside down bear cave" If I said "u" he would have  a meltdown,(his name had a U in it) If I said upside down bear cave he'd write a U and things would move on. I did this for a couple of months and was surprised when I heard him spell his name with a U. It was never an issue again.

OK, this is getting long, but I wanted to share my thoughts on this. I believe some obsessions are a result of deep fears and a strong need to have some control over their enviroment. It is much like telling someone who is deeply afraid of snakes that there's nothing to be afraid of - it's not going to change how they feel or how they react.

mama to Sam PDD NOS OCD ODD PPD

Oh! That really resonated with me since I have a deep fear of snakes. To the point where I used to not even be able to look at a still picture of one. Sometimes even a cartoon one, like in The Jungle Book!

Wow - I don't know why, but for some reason that really got me closer to understanding my son's fears/obsessions. Thanks maisa! But boy do I really feel D-U-M-B for not making THAT connection sooner and on my own! my son has many obsessions. i was told they helped him control his environment and if they didn't bother me or cause him any harm to leave him alone with them. i have learned to let it go with his compulsiveness and he is calmer being allowed to do these things. sometimes he is told flat out right no and he will stop. sad story about the woman and her son with elton john, cd and music one of my sons obsessions and he  plays them over and over. got him a persosnal cd player so everyone else doesn't have to hear it. can work around them if you try. he is obsessed about his bathroom being clean which is ok with me. he now cleans it himself to his liking and i don't have to clean it. wish i could get him to want to clean the kitchen also. Obsessions are so interesting, especially when you hear a familiar one.
Street signs made me smile, because Jair has always been very obsessive
about everything while riding in a car. It used to be constantly, "Going
up... going down... going up..." with the slightest inclines. Then it was
"Turning left... turning right..." LOL Whenever we crossed a RR track, or
went under an overpass, we had to have these entire scripted
conversations which I hated - but hated his screaming more. @@
Recently the big thing has been stoplights, since he learned the stoplight
song: "Red means stop, green means go. Yellow means wait! You'd
better go slow!" It upsets him immensely if I do not slow down for
a yellow light. He really freaks out. I've tried changing the song to "
yellow means speed up, before it turns red!" hehe but it's not
working... Riding everywhere with him makes me wonder why people like
those talking GPS things. I just want to drive in silence!

Ds goes in phases, but when I am consistently giving him fish oil - the obsessions subside a lot. But, they perk up again when a stressful situation is occurring. For instance, now - in his anticipation of starting kindergarten! He is back on hurricanes and tornadoes - of course, this IS the season for those. But, I am a little tired of the weather channel.

I have gone with what stickboy has said and not really limited him much except when we are in public. And, his friends down the block recently asked him why he talked about hurricanes so much. I asked them if they would like him to stop and they said yes. This helped him limit the amount he talks about hurricanes around them at least - he desperately wants to keep their friendships!

My 10 yr old loves christmas lights and has his own display in the dining room..we work with behav spec and she does cognitive therapy with him and we are going to start with antidepressants next week....I gave Inositol a trial, it helps, but his OCD is too severe!!

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=1071&a=7103

this article has a section about obsessions and why they occur,   and also other very interesting information about repetitive behavior and rouitine.

How old is your babe souljen?

BB is still interested in flushing and there was a time when it was impossible to peel him away from the toilet without a fight.  This phase DID pass after a few months (and trust me...daycare and the schiool were pleased with this).  I think one of the things that helped was giving him that which was appropriate to flush.  After he pees in the potty we give him one toilet paper square.  He wipes himself and throws it in.  Then he flushes and is very intent on watching the swirl.  Sometimes he gets really excited, the hands will flap and he will flush a few more times.  After the first flush, if caught in time, a "Good job flushing" and closing the lid seems to work well, but there has to be something to move to next (ie. Now we brush our teeth!)

BB also seems to have a problem often with certain lights being off.  Last night we were two rooms away from the dinner table, but he caught me turning out the light out of his peripheral vision.  He was VERY pissed.  He came running in and yelled at me, "Light OFF!  Light OFF!"  I turned it back on and he was fine.

He can't tell me right now why he wants it that way, but he does.  I do believe, however that your "toilet flushing" phase will pass.  Make it structured and have it move into a new exercise.

Good luck!

I think it could always be worse though,  I remember going into my sons school last year.  He had just started and i was standing talking with the teacher before class started,  a little boy came up to me and lay down beside me admiring my feet,  He didn't touch me just layed there the whole time, The teacher said he likes feet and does it to everyone who comes in the class.  Funny to me, but i'm sure it drives his mother nuts.

I also remember reading a very sad story on the internet where an older man with autism,  In his 20's i believe,  lived with his mother.  He spent 24 hours straight playing  an elton john song over and over again at full volume and would not stop.  His mother lost it and killed him.   My heart sank into my stomach when i read the outcome.   It scared me and made me cry .  

 

I wonder if it would help to get him a fridge magnet that makes a flushing sound.  I bought one on vacation once.  Probably can buy one on the internet.

 

and he's not verbal!  Caden, 4, flushes the toilet CONSTANTLY.  We finally had to just lock the door and take him every so often.  Tonight, I left the door open.  He flushed a bar of soap.  Whenever he is in there, he will flush 10 times if no one is paying attention. 

He also turns lights on and off constantly.

And my walls?  BARE.  He doesn't like anything on them and will knock them off.  Doesn't like antennas...breaks those too...

Fast forward me through this stage, ok?  Now my toilet doesn't work properly and surely a plumber will have to come take care of this...


Get a lock!  Either a door lock or a toilet lock.

My son was flushed so many things down the toilet we've had the plumber here 3 times in the last year to clean out trap.  I'm crossing my fingers, he hasn't flushed anything for a little over a month. 

   I hope for you he loses interest in that. 

My other son is so obssessed with street signs,  it is driving me absolutely batty.  I actually lost my patience with him today.  got loud and said Enough with the signs,  I'm tired of it.   He cried so bad,  sobbing and saying but my speed limit 25 ,  I need it.    It sort of broke my heart but I told my husband i think we are feeding it too much. 

so anyway i can relate.  The obsessions get old for us quick but for them its an ongoing passion for something. 

I'm curious if any of you feed into the obsessions or try to blow them off or ignore them or divert. 

 

Oh yeah Btw,   the street sign thing has been going on here for over a year now.........sorry that doesn't make you feel any better  but i'm sure the people here can give you good advice on how to divert him.    I'm interested in that also.

Thanks, carolc8632, for the link to that NAS article.  I'm a huge fan of the NAS website, but I hadn't run across that particular article yet.  For those of you who didn't have time to read it, the article includes a summary at the end.  Here it is:

In summary

Source:  http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=1071&a=7103

 


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