Hi all...
Next week we are expecting a houseguest for 3 weeks. She's nice enough, but the only thing that gets to me is the remarks that she makes. I was wondering how to handle them.
I don't think she has a good understanding of autism and thinks my son will just start talking one day. It's fine if that's what she believes, because like I said, she doesn't understand the disorder.. It's the things she says that makes me feel as if I am to blame for his problems communicating.
She will say things about her friend's 4 year old like, "he talks like such a little man, his parents taught him". Or, "If matthew doesn't eat vegetable, it's because that's how you accustomed him to eat". I know it's petty, maybe I'm paranoid, because I just don't like when people blame his issues on what they perceive to be my incompetence as a mother.
What do you guys think?
Nakama
Patience is a virtue with people like that...unfortunately it is not a virtue of mine! I would probably try to bite my tongue and if I couldn't tell her maybe her staying at my house is not the best option.
I've tried printing out some reading material, but it gets overlooked. I can say that I am not looking forward to this visit!!
nakama
[QUOTE=foxl]
I think she is in denial! Yes, autistic kids DO need to be taught some things, that other kids do not.
Have you tried leaving pamphlets around the house?
[/QUOTE]
You know, that's a really good idea. I would leave a bunch of books on autism laying around as well.
I would not be, either.
My closest friend told me T is "just too precious." Like I made her this way by SPOILING her! I think she is beginning to understand, but I was not hesitant to use a sledge hammer! I get the SAME thing from my MIL - I kick her out the door around a week...I can't stand it. I book her airfare when she comes b/c of her condescending tones. She is CONSTANTLY trying to un-do the discipline that we do w/ ds.
I think she is in denial! Yes, autistic kids DO need to be taught some things, that other kids do not.
Have you tried leaving pamphlets around the house?
You're doing better than me (and my temper) if you can keep your mouth shut...but I think that it would get the point across if you don't continue the conversation.
I don't have any great advice.....Will you be able to have time away from her while she is there? I would probably try to get some time away from her and bite my tongue the rest of the time and wish the visit was over....I hope the visit goes by fast.
think I would probably take the approach of saying like, "Well, that's
interesting you say that because most of the experts/professionals we've
seen have suggested we do XXX. Mind you, these are individuals with a lot
of school and experience in dealing with children like XXXX. They are
knowledgeble and smart, so I trust their advice."
This essentially implies (in a polite way) that the individual making the
condescending comments is not knowledgable or smart and is only going to
continue to look that way if they continue with their comments.
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