Mental obsessions...Help! | Autism PDD

OK, this might sound really stupid and I apologize if it does, lol!

But the first thing I thought of after reading Shell's post (which I agree with) was this, and this pertains to him maybe not understanding that you can love both of them at the same time.  I'm wondering if he has a pet?  And maybe if he did this might help him understand what it means to love more than one person at a time?

Maybe I am way off base here, lol...but it was just the first thing that popped into my head.

Good luck with everything!

The first thought that jumped into my head is whether or not your son is really scared that this man will do these things, or is he scared of you eventually getting married and this is the way that emotion is manifesting itself.

We had a kind of similar situation like this in my family.  My sister married a wonderful man 3 years ago.  Her husband has a son, M, who is now 13, who they have full custody of.  (Her husbands ex had all sorts of substance issues and has not been a constant presence.)  My sister, her husband and his son lived together before they married and it went really well.  They got a bigger apartment and M had his own room for the first time in his life.  He LOVED having a space of his own and they were all really happy.  However, when my sister and her husband told him they were getting married all hell broke loose.  It was only through family therapy that they eventually go to the root of it.  M was afraid that marriage would lead to a baby and that the baby would be given his room.  It wasn't that he didn't love my sister, he just made some erroneous assumptions about life after marriage.  (Of course they eventually bought a house, had a baby, who my nephew adores, and my nephew has a huge room he doesn't have to share!)

Sometimes what the child says is the issue is really masking a deeper issue.  I wish I had some practical advice to give you, this is a tough one.

I think if he can  make you to believe this man will hurt you both

it will be back to you and him.

i think he see's your friend has a threat to what you and your son have

try to make him see that you an love more than person at a time

and loving someone else will not stop you loving him

love shell

spectrummum39316.4925462963I have a 14-year old son with AS and  Tourette.  I have been dating a gentleman for the past 4 years who has been a great influence in my son's life and is very understanding and has a good relationship with my son.  We broke up at the first of the year and recently got back together in May.  My son has had issues with trusting this man, understandbly, but has also picked up some very strange notions about him, which I feel are obsessive in nature.  Two years ago, this man told him of a time in his life when he was a teenager and troubled and that he stole items for money.  My son recently saw a 48 hours mystery show about a man who not only steals cars, but kills people too.  Now my son has latched on to the idea that my boyfriend will do the same thing to us.  We have been to counseling and she indicated that this is his reality right now and he has to work through this and that it gets down to trust.   He wants to talk about this ALL THE TIME!  Do I hear him out, but not fuel it by letting him talk about it incessantly.  I love this man and we will marry someday, but I am concerned about the feelings my son has towars him, even though they are not valid.  Any suggestions?
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