Am I alone??? | Autism PDD
You can have weeks like this. And then your child will do this dumb little thing that no other parent in the world would barely notice, and your heart will do hand-stands!
You'll be on this site faster than you can say HOLY MOLY! And be typing in - HE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID "THANKS FOR ICE CREAM". And you will have friends across the globe whooping and cheering for your child and for you.
This whole autism parenting thing can be a gut sucking roller coaster ride, but the thrills we get cannot be matched by anybody else. You are learning to be 200 times the parent you would have been had your child been born just boring. The down sides are awful, of course, but if you look closely, you willl see some up sides. Your kid, whether you realize it or not, is watching you. Seeing how you handle difficulties. How you handle frustration. Seeing how you show love and concern. And respect.
You have never in your life been so important and so loved as you are today. Never! What your mom and dad felt for you as their child? Pshaw, baby, that ain't nothing compared to what your autistic child feels for you. You are the sun and the moon and the stars to that child. So what if a little cloud cover smokes past now and then? Like these celestial objects, you will always be there for your child. And he for one knows it.
Clouds are okay! You're still there shining! Okay?
Are you overwhelmed with things to do and informatiom when it comes to your child???
Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..?
Do you notice people shaking there heads behind your back when your child does something innappropriate??
Is your house a mess?? Yes, lol. No matter how much I clean (and I clean daily), it is always a mess. Ds does some of the craziest things.... Did you know it is possible for crayons to write clear as day on berber carpet? I have a smilie face biggier than me in the middle of ds's room, lol.
Are your walls void of artwork and decoration ( not including the crayon and marker) No. Well almost, lol. Ds is constantly hiding crayons in his pocket when I am not looking, so later on he can color on the walls. I have to do a mass wall cleaning every few weeks. Mr Clean Magic eraser is my best friend, lol. But I did find one solution for artwork. You can but big posters of most famous art pieces. And for at wal-mart, they have these huge, plastic, poster frames. I have had them for years, and ds has done everythign known to man to them, and they still look great. It doesn't look tacky either, I get a lot of compliments on them.
Are your shelves bare??? No, because I don't have sheves
Do you have less dinnerware and glassware than you did in the past??? Yes Do you miss family functions because of crowds and unfamiliar surroundings?? Yes for my family, but mainly because they don't understand, and that isn't ds's fault. It also isn't abig issue for us though, because we are military and live states away from our family. I was quite
Do you avoid the mall because your little guy is a runner??? Just the mall?! everywhere, lol. I know what you mean! lol. I am lucky ds is still able to fit in a stroller, and in the tops of grocery carts. If I cant strap him in, we are in for trouble. He lets me know that he is not happy with being strapped in, and from stopping him from getting out, but I would rather deal with that than him running off and getting hurt or lost. I don't know what i will do when he grows out of the stroller
have you counted to 100 a hundred times, or recited the alphabet a million times, or stopped at every street sign known to man just to look at the shape and color??? No, that isn't one of ds's things. Singing is a big thing for him, so I have to sing him songs when he gets upset (normally anywhere from 5 min to 45 mins of me singing, it depends on him, lol). I generally just have to bring cars with us and his attachment items (I have a bookbag for all his treasures) when we leave the house. I can't imagine having to stop at every sign, or deal with the wrath (((hugs))). are you still childproofing your house even though your child is past the age of having to childproof? Yeap! lol. My doors are so childproofed, that I even have to help guests open the door to leave. It can be embarrasing, but nessesary. (((HUGS))) It is okay to have a bad day. We all have them. I hope tomorrow is better
Yes Michael shows me everyday how much he loves me. He likes to put his face right up to mine and rub his nose on me. its beautiful
I guess most of the time my bad days come more from myself. I am unhappy with the way i've handled the problems that we've encountered daily. My frustration has mounted mostly out of not knowing what to do. Thats why i'm here to try and learn new ways to help my child because what i'm doing now isn't working for any of us. Thank you so much for making me see more clearly what i've know all along. Reading this thread made me feel better. So thank you for this, and for
your "bad day" because it made me believe that I am (we) are not alone.
And time always brings hope. Hi everyone. Not feeling sorry for myself, just wondering if there are others out there that are having similar experiences.. here goes: Are you overwhelmed with things to do and informatiom when it comes to your child??? Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..? Do you notice people shaking there heads behind your back when your child does something innappropriate?? Is your house a mess?? Are your walls void of artwork and decoration ( not including the crayon and marker) Are your shelves bare??? Do you have less dinnerware and glassware than you did in the past??? Do you miss family functions because of crowds and unfamiliar surroundings?? Do you avoid the mall because your little guy is a runner??? have you counted to 100 a hundred times, or recited the alphabet a million times, or stopped at every street sign known to man just to look at the shape and color??? are you still childproofing your house even though your child is past the age of having to childproof? Maybe i am feeling sorry for myself alittle.
Just a bad day i guess, Tomorrow is another day Carol. You just described me at this time last year. You are not alone....and we all have bad days. How old is your child? Biggest Hug! I have 2 boys, ages 3 and 4 Michael is 4 high functioning autism Timmy is 3, coming up on an evaluation. he shows signs of ocd, adhd. Has language comprehension problems, emotionally delayed. Sept 7th we will find out a diagnosis for him. Thanks for responding and thanks for the hug
1) Overwhelmed with things to do and information when it comes to ds. 2) Not many people in my life have a good understanding of my childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..? 3) My house is a mess! 4) Counted to 100 lots of times, alphabet lots of times. I've also talked about hurricanes, tornadoes, bedbugs and Peter Pan more than I ever, ever wanted to! YES!!! YES!! My hand are burning right now, because I have soent the last 1/2 cleaning my walls. Washable marker -- Is not washable!!! Yes!!!! Are you talking about my paper plates????? The other day at Target my son was in the cart and a woman got a little to close to us. Well, he tried to push her cart away. He is not even four -- not much pushing ability there. She flung his hand away and made the most digusted sound. I just rolled my eyes and walked on. Then she (very nasty BTW) asked me what my problem was. Oh! good grief!!!! Son, age 20, autistic, non-verbal, OCD. While boyfriend power-washing neighbor's house today, Paul dumped wash bucket. Boyfriend refilled. Paul ran across street again. Boyfriend thought he was going to spill, but Paul only wanted to touch rim of bucket. Boyfriend overreacted, big wrestling match in front yard. Son got very angry, came home & took anger out on me, headbutting, hair pulling. Then he ran back across street & fell in flip flops, tearing up both knees & possibly broke shin or kneecap. Have to take to urgent care tmrw. All over a stupid of bucket of water! Boyfriend has lived with us for 8 years. He should have known better!!
Thanks. needed to vent. Welcome to the club! We all have those days and yes I have counted and said ABC's more than I EVER thought I would- sometimes it feels like talking to the wall. So many people don't "get it" but everyone here does. I like the term having an autistic child is like preparing for a long trip to Italy, then suddenly you are sent to the Phillipeans with little or no warning. You have no time to pack accordingly and you get no chance to work on how you feel about it or if you want to go. It is a rollercoater of a ride- come here and feel sorry for yourself every day if need be until you have a great day and come share that too! Are you overwhelmed with things to do and informatiom when it comes to your child??? Yes. I thought working in the Sped school would help, but someday I think it's worse Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..? Yes, and the worse is my husband still doesn't "get it" Do you notice people shaking there heads behind your back when your child does something innappropriate?? Again, Yes. Use to break my heart, but I try not to let it anymore Is your house a mess?? Thankfully no, my DS is a neat feak. Are your walls void of artwork and decoration ( not including the crayon and marker) From him, yes they are. Just this year he noticed that. He made me a picture that his little sister helped him with Are your shelves bare???
Do you have less dinnerware and glassware than you did in the past??? Nope, the one place I was smart in. He only has access to the plastic stuff. Do you miss family functions because of crowds and unfamiliar surroundings?? Only if my husband can't go. If he is there, then my DS & I can walk away to regroup. Do you avoid the mall because your little guy is a runner??? Only at Christmas time when it's way too busy for him to focus. have you counted to 100 a hundred times, or recited the alphabet a million times, or stopped at every street sign known to man just to look at the shape and color???
are you still childproofing your house even though your child is past the age of having to childproof? We do still have some up, but (knock on wood) he has been good with the "Don't touch/open that" Maybe i am feeling sorry for myself alittle.
Just a bad day i guess, Tomorrow is another day Are you overwhelmed with things to do and information when it comes to your child??? Yes Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..? Yes Do you notice people shaking there heads behind your back when your child does something inappropriate?? Yes, but have started not to really care what they think. Is your house a mess?? Not a total mess, I clean everyday, and deep clean on the weekends when the hubby can help with the kids. Are your walls void of artwork and decoration ( not including the crayon and marker) Have all type of pics and art on my wall. I have just the stiff for you to remove the crayon, ink, markers and any types of stains. I will start a thread about the cleaner and where to find it. It's called Incredible Stain remover. I had to buy it online for just a few bucks Are your shelves bare??? More clutter than bare. Do you have less dinnerware and glassware than you did in the past??? We use plastic plates and cups for the kids. (better safe than sorry) Do you miss family functions because of crowds and unfamiliar surroundings?? Do you avoid the mall because your little guy is a runner??? Not anymore, we got the monkey/backpack/restraint and it is AWESOME!! at wal-mart. have you counted to 100 a hundred times, or recited the alphabet a million times, or stopped at every street sign known to man just to look at the shape and color??? OH Lord yes. are you still childproofing your house even though your child is past the age of having to childproof? To a certain extent. Maybe i am feeling sorry for myself alittle. Just a bad day i guess, Tomorrow is another day I will surely win the award for the messiest house anytime of the day.
And I can totally relate to everything else that has been said here. It's soooo hard sometimes, it really is. Mary It will get better:) (((hugs!!))) Everything I did was for my dd in her first 3-4 years after diagnosed was based on if she was learning something or regressing..what new sx is she going to begin?? Feeling like I couldnt go anywhere that had people or noise...or no quick exits:) I dont worry anymore about her as much as I worry about the evils of the world that can hurt her now and her naiveness....so I guess once one set of anxieties go away...there is always another to take its place.Are you overwhelmed with things to do and informatiom when it comes
first let me hug you {{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} wish i lived closer to you to encourage you in person! Are you overwhelmed with things to do and informatiom when it comes to your child??? YES Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..? How about NO ONE except my sons medical team? Do you notice people shaking there heads behind your back when your child does something innappropriate?? This does not bother me A BIT! Do you miss family functions because of crowds and unfamiliar surroundings?? our family is non existent Do you avoid the mall because your little guy is a runner??? yes are you still childproofing your house even though your child is past the age of having to childproof? yes and my guy is 8! Maybe i am feeling sorry for myself alittle.
have you counted to 100 a hundred times, or recited the alphabet a million times, or stopped at every street sign known to man just to look at the shape and color??? im still waiting on this one! ((())) hugs, my heart goes out to you! and youre not feeling sorry for yourself, your getting youself one of the only types of therapies any of us can afford the money or time for. so WAY TO GO on being A GR8 PARENT!!! Thanks to everyone for your hugs and responses. Today was definately a better day, I'm feeling more positive and hopeful that things will get better.
Its also refreshing to know that we all can relate to eachothers daily lives. Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..? Is your house a mess?? Are your shelves bare??? Do you have less dinnerware and glassware than you did in the past??? [/QUOTE] THese were my faves....and I wanted to say....it does get better...... My shelves were bare and no one dared leave anyhting out in the open....but now....shelves have a few things on them....even a few games stacked in corner Dinnerware/glassware....seriously have gone through 4-5 complete sets....but the last one has been around for more than a year and mostly complete.....AND she clears her own plates and places ever-so-delictely in the sink !
Just want you to know.....it DOES get better.....I have had many a day in the past where I was ready to throw in towel.....and though I still do have some days....it is mostly better ! ps....to all who mentioned plastic instead of breakables...... oh-no.....Erin can break ANYTHING even plastic !! I Swear to GOD !!! Ha, If its plastic it just makes them try harder to break it.!!!! You wouldn't even believe the list of broken things we have gone through here and my 3 yo has told me he wants to "break the house" And he is working on that
I cant believe I said that!
thanks for being here
missnippy/Yvonne
Yes its overwhelming but things WILL get better
I completely understand. You just described me. I have 4 children chelsea is my youngest 5 she was diagnosed with ASD when she was 2. Caleb is my oldest 12 he has very severe learning disabilities. Kara is 11 she has ADHD. And My Katie is the only one with no disability. My husband suffers from Glacoma. He has had it since birth. He is now blind. I work third shift at a State facility with people with MR and other disabilites. Very severe dis. So when i get home i am already so tired i cant keep my head up. So the house is a mess dishes need to be washed clothes you name it. There comes a time when i feel so lost like i dont know where to turn or which end is up. So if anyone has any possible solutions or magic wands please send them.
Yes
I don't think that you are feeling sorry for yourself, just simply having "one of THOSE days". We all have them, some more than others, but it will be ok. Just hang in there and lean on us for support.
to your child???
YES!!!!!
Do you find that not many people in your life have a good understanding
of your childs needs, wants, personality, behavior ect..?
YES!!!!
Do you notice people shaking there heads behind your back when your
child does something innappropriate??
YES!!!!
Is your house a mess??
YES, YES, YES!!!!!
Do you miss family functions because of crowds and unfamiliar
surroundings??
Not family, but Birthday parties and social events can be touch and go...
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!!
Here's a great big 
!I feel your pain daily. Child proof, my son takes every child proof thing a part in secs. and he's 2 yrs old.
I don't blame myself just my genetics. I think I've yelled at God a couple of times asking why me? I know that sounds silly but then I thought about it. I don't think most famlies could handle kids like mine. I would not trade them in for the world.
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