DD is talking like a brat...for no reason | Autism PDD

your girl sounds like my orli. i'm stil havig that prubblem  with her and she is soon to be 11Years old in sep27.and cross eyes to . she scarss me alot. but i have got hope that somday she will get bettar. hop hop thets what i say .you she did chainge a bit .some thigs she did in the past . she stopd doing it.good lock in kindergardan she wil be difrent then at home .if she woold love kind- she shell be ok . if not then not ok. good lock. dds mom.

Find out what motivates her, then everytime she talks nice to you or follows your directive without arguing or back-talking, reward her.  This approach does work....you just have to be proactive rather than reactive.

 

My dd just turned 5.  Her speech and language has always been her main issue.  I think she is on the spectrum but I do not have a dx.  I like to say she has one foot on asd and the other on nt.  Its really hard to tell unless you are with her all the time.

Lately she has been talking back.  She yells at me and gives me so much grief.  But, honestly, I dont think she is doing it to be bad.  I dont think she "gets" what she is doing.  If I ask her to brush her teeth she will go on and on for a good five minutes before she gets in the bathroom.  She says things like...'I will do what I want...you always tell me to do things I dont want to do."  All the while she is yelling, her eyes cross and she is trembling. 

We tell her all the time that she is sounding mean and its better to say things nicely.  She has no idea what I am talking about and nothing changes.  She doesnt get she is being "bad."  This scares me since she is starting Kindergarten in a few days. 

Any ideas?  Telling her things do not "click."  She does not get it. 

My daughter does something like that 1. try  postive reward, you want bla/bla gotta be good. If that doesn't work
 2 either send her to time out or I pick her up, move her the bathroom and brush her teeth. She usually goes crazy but I got my point across.

I agree...have consequences for inappropriate behaviors like time out or priviledges taken away and be sure to reward the good ones with lots of verbal praise and stickers..

Another great tool we used to extinct many of these head strong behaviors was to totally ignore her when she did them even if it meant going in a different room..make it clear that you are not going to respond or look at her when she acts this way and model for her better ways to communicate..and if she cant comply then she will get a time out..she will learn quickly that noncompliance will not get her no attention or rewards and will start to do what you want but the whole family has to be consistent in this area at ALL times:)

Best of luck!

Yep -- mine started in when she hit Kg, too!   Just resisted EVERYTHING, at times, and very smart-mouthed.

Worst story was, she informed my DH, "If you need to know ANYTHING about Mrs. J., you ask ME.  You are NOT supposed to be talking to HER!"  As if ... our biggest stressor from her Kg year was that she told us NOTHING about school.

It gets better for while, and worse for a while ... and THEN, they hit puberty.  Run for the HILLS!

Just wait 7 more years and the hormones have come.
My 5yr old ASD son will brush his teeth and pick up when asked. He has
been trained to do so.

My 13yr Nt daughter, if in a mood , will talk back and roll her eyes. By the
way, all I asked her was 1. Did you brush your teeth. Did you pick up your
room. Sometimes that oppositional behavior sets in. She just has to do the
opposite of what I asked her to do. I also do not give her any attention.
Because if I did , it would be all negative .I wonder if it is a Mother /Daughter
thing.I've been told that if you want a sense for what you're going to be dealing
with during puberty, try to remember what your child was like at age 2 and
3, then put a 1 in front of those numbers. Essentially, if your child was a
nightmare at age 2, then at age 12, look out. Of course, this theory didn't
come from anyone in the medical field, just some moms who have "been
there, done that". I am truly NOT looking forward to the teen years with my
NT daughter. If she's anything like she was as a toddler.....headstrong,
beyond stubborn, defiant, and basically, incredibly difficult, life with her as a
teen will be close to unbearable      [QUOTE=foxl]

Yep -- mine started in when she hit Kg, too!   Just resisted EVERYTHING, at times, and very smart-mouthed.

Worst story was, she informed my DH, "If you need to know ANYTHING about Mrs. J., you ask ME.  You are NOT supposed to be talking to HER!"  As if ... our biggest stressor from her Kg year was that she told us NOTHING about school.

It gets better for while, and worse for a while ... and THEN, they hit puberty.  Run for the HILLS!

[/QUOTE]Since my son's vocabulary expanded this past school yr he has become very resistent to doing things as well and has a smart mouth. Don't know what I'm going to do b/c this is going to get him in lots of trouble!
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