my nephew has PDD NOS & i need to relate | Autism PDD

my name is Tricia and im 18 yrs old, i live with my parents and my 5 yr old nephew Daniel. Daniel was diagnosed with PDD NOS not to long ago. He will be starting kindergarden on the 25th. He likes to have things his way or no way, and he throws really severe temper tantrums. He doesnt interact with kids his age, so i dont know how he is going to be in school. his doctors put him on ritalin la to calm him down during the day, and some medicine to help him sleep at night. and even when he is on it he doesnt sleep but maybe 2 or 3 hours a night. this is really worrying me, and its really frustrating to be around him when i know there is nothing i can do to fix it. I am tryin to keep my patients with him but sometimes he just gets to the end of the line.

if anyone has any advice please give it to me, i really need it

Hi Tricia

I know this must be hard for you, and all of your family. I have a son with PDD and he has come a long way. He is not aggressive, and has never been on medication. He is very high funtioning. but there are all degrees of PDD. Do all you can, if you get frustrated, then leave the room, take some time out for yourself. Does he get any home schooling, like ABA?

This is a great forum for you to talk and let out your thoughts and feelings. You are not alone and it is very hard to deal with this at times. Hopefully when he starts school, you will see an improvement, and maybe he will sleep better at night. My thoughts are with you

hello Tricia, first of welcome to the board and like love said this is a great place tovent or just to talk. i have a 5yr.with pdd-nos.Daniel and my son Carlo sound a lot alike, it's is way or no way too. and he also has really bad tantrums also. he has to take 2 meds to help him sleep at night or else he won't sleep. I must say i'm proud of you even though i don't know you, for seeking help and advice for how to deal with him.i agree with lovw take some time for yourself and maybe check into some support groups in your area. and you might want to get more info on pdd-nos, to help you better understand it. also at the top of the forum there is a post for newbies, check it out there is some great links there for you. also know that were all here for you and understand what your going thru. take care and if you need to talk you can p.m. me any time. until next time.Mom2carlo

Hi Tricia

I"m glad that you are willing to ask for help to be able to handle your nephew. I know there will be lots more of replies to your plea.In my country, PDD is not yet fully explored unlike in the US, though it is now acceptable in society as topic for discussion. So you can just imagine how much more difficult it is to mainstream those with the condition. I am a psychologist by profession and believe me there is more to your nephew than you trying to "fix" him. He is not broken, in the first place. He is just special. And just like anything special, we just need extra time to take care and understand. I know it is difficult for you especially so that you also have other things that needs your time, attention and strength but I do believe anything that you can extend your nephew - more understanding, more flexibility - will be much appreciated not only by your parents but by your nephew in the long run.

Read more about PDD. It will help you get more insights as to how you can further strengthen your bond with your nephew. Share your learnings to your parents and friends, so they too will have a more tangible understanding of your nephew.

Don't forget the more you have fun with yourself, the more you will be able to extend the fun to your nephew.

Take care.

I agree with everyone else here. You're thoughtful to seek out help and support. My son was dx'd with PDD NOS as well and, though he doesn't throw tantrums at all and sleeps well, sometimes it can still be frustrating to deal with his "non-conformities." Have you ever seen the Christmas special "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer"? Maybe it would help a little to try to think of your nephew like that ... he's not the same as others, yet most likely he has a special gift to share with the world, even if that gift has yet to reveal itself. Your nephew isn't trying to be difficult; his brain is trying the best it can to deal with all the sensory input that he receives. Children on the spectrum often have a hard time dealing with all the stimulus around them, so they sometimes cling to routines and 'sameness' just so they can have a bit of security in (what they perceive as) a very insecure world. When you feel you're reaching the end of your patience, take a break from him if you can.

Good luck and feel free to come to this forum anytime you need to vent or anything. We all can relate to how you feel!
Kellie

Hi Tricia Welcome to the board! You must love your nephew very much to want to help make things better for him and its frustrating when you can't. Has he had any special ed preschool? Therapy? Sometimes counseling for the people in his life who love and care for him will help.

If the meds aren't helping maybe it needs to be discussed with the doctor to either increase the dosage or try a different med. As far as sleep I would recommend trying a weighted blanket, white noise in the background, a bed tent, calming activities before bed and consistent predictable routine EVERY night. Most of our kids have sleep issues unfortunately.

The same with behaviors. These kids tend to memorize. The take in EVERYTHING going on around them all the time.... so the more going on the more easily they are over stimulated. Consistent routine structure and predictability should help. Everyone talking the same way to him expecting the same things from him redirecting the same way and so forth should make it predictable for him to know what is expected. Preparing him as well as possible in advance for changes should also help.

Theres links in the newbie thread to sleep issues weighted blankkets bed tents calming activities and so forth..... There is also a link about sensory issues which in my opinion is ALOT of the cause for their meltdowns (besides their inability to understand or communicate and their resistance to change) you may want to check it out.... its written in plain english so its really easy to understand. Sensory Integration - Must Read

I always try to look from my son's side of things and see things as he is probably relating to them. It helps me have more patients with him. The more patients I show the less severe his meltdowns are.