Well, both my kids had good eye contact as infants. Ds' was particularly intense - like he was staring into your soul. His eye contact lessened significantly when he was about 3 years old - shortly after his flu shot (but we're not going there!).
But from what you say, I wouldn't be terribly concerned at this point. It's good you are keeping an eye out - but in the meantime, enjoy your baby and just keep an extra bit of watch on him!
My ds's eye contact has always been a little poor but my mom tell me soI was wondering if you could please give me your experience with eye contact.
I have a 17 week old son and he gives great eye contact when I am holding him in the position of feeding him a bottle, if he is in his rocker, on the change table, etc. However, he is not that great with the eye contact when I am holding him sitting on my lap. He has been giving it a bit more lately but I have to act quite silly and sing to him to keep him interested when he is on my lap.
From your experience, is this what they mean when they say lack of eye contact? Does it mean that they try to avoid eye contact in all positions or can it be only in one position and still qualify? Has anyone ever experienced this? He also will watch anyone and everyone when they are moving around the room and doesn't take his eyes off them.
Thanks so much for your help! I really appreciate your input.
I can only speak to my experience and I'm not at very well versed on the clinical version of poor eye contact.
My daughter NEVER had eye contact with any of us from day one. It was like she wasn't even in the room with us. She didn't track people or objects with her eyes and when I held her she just stared blankly at her own fingers or out in space.
Eye contact is beyond just looking at you....it encompasses interaction between two and again can be with an object as well, looking and tracking a toy.
The fact that he does follow people with his eyes I think is great. If you have any concerns at all the best thing is to bring it up at next ped. appt.
This is a silly question....but perhaps....when you are holding him and feel his eye contact is poor.....is it possible that he is just busy trying to see everything else in the room and taking in his surroundings ? Because THAT is just as important as looking directly at you. Any interest in you or surroundings is what eye contact is about. Little to no interest in others is what poor eye contact is about.
Thanks so much for your response. I have thought he was just interested in the other going ons but if I put my face in front of his he turns away from me. It is like playing dodge ball.
I was also thinking that maybe he just doesn't like me that close in his face and it is a personality trait???
He does seem to like attention and is happy as long as you are in his face goo gooing and gaaing as long as he is lying on his back. If you walk away, he cries and wants you to entertain him again to keep him happy. Is that a good sign?
I am just nervous as I feel like something just isn't 100% and I came across a website that said if you think there is something wrong as a mother then you are probably right and that has made me extremely paranoid ever since.
I have read your message board from top to bottom and know that if anyone is going to be able to answer me honestly it is the people here.
Thank you!
Roxanne
[QUOTE=roxannemur]If you walk away, he cries and wants you to entertain him again to keep him happy. Is that a good sign?
Roxanne
[/QUOTE]
I would say YES that is a very good sign....Erin was always content to be in her "own world" and didn't fuss if you left her.
Again....every kid with an ASD is differnet...but that is MY expreience for what it is worth.....
Parents are natural worriers and have lots of concerns -- some of them unfounded. The problem is when professionals dismiss our concerns without giving us satisfying answers, overestimating their own professional competence and underestimating our own competence as the ONLY experts about our particular child.
A particular problem is when professionals fail to ask the right questions, to help us describe our often vague sense that something is wrong. Through this forum, people can get access to the right questions.
Here, for example, is the CHAT autism screening for 18 month olds.
http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=128&a=2226
As far as eye contact goes, I'd say that an almost complete lack of eye contact would be the concern at such a young age. In a recent Newsweek article, an autism expert said:
"I had to learn to retrain my eyes when I started to see the 14-month-olds. I thought autism at 14 months was going to look like autism at 36 months, the age at which people normally diagnose it. It's the same flavor--the social system is disrupted, the communication system is disrupted. But it's different in that it's not as pervasively disrupted. What I mean is that at 14 months, you can get kids with autism to give you a beautiful response to peekaboo. But you can't get the child to engage with you around more novel, new activities. At 14 months, you see more flickers of interaction. They were doing some looking at people and smiling."
Are you seeing any other red flags?
Sharlet will avoid eye contact if I try to look in her eyes, she will quickly avertThe sleep issues and interest in the tv don't sound like red flags to me either. Does he look/respond when you call his name?
You're lucky to have other children, so you can more readily see how your son's development diverges from the norm.
Good luck with everything.
Thank you everyone for your informative replies!
The only other red flags that I have noticed at this stage is that he loves to look at the tv and outside windows. I am not sure if that is just a normal phase they go through at this age or not? You can break his attention away from it if you talk or snap your fingers and his eyes do blink while he is doing it so I am not sure if that qualifies as staring? I think I read once that to qualify as really intent it had to be solid watching for quite a long period without looking away. Is that true? But he can spot a tv from a mile away!
Also he is still not sleeping through the night and wakes generally when his next bottle would be due. We do a dreamfeed at 10:30pm and we have to go in and put the dummy in at 2am and he goes until 5:30am without having another bottle. My other children were fantastic through the night sleepers from about 10-12 weeks so for me this is unusual. Then again maybe this is still okay as many NT children have sleep issues.
Cin0516 -- his eye contact with others is actually quite good. It is like he sees something new and not my boring face so he actually looks at them more....strange. His dad can get the most eye contact usually especially when he has his glasses on!!
Thanks so much everyone and the best I can do is take your advice and keep a watchful eye over the next few months and see what unfolds.
Roxanne
Its probably nothing but curiosity (a good sign!), but just keep your eyes peeled as your son develops.
I had my first blip of worry when Cole was 7 months old, and he is fairly mild in his autism. I read in my baby books that an infant adores gazing at his mother's face, etc.
Cole would look at my face some, but I had these giant triangular, nave blue valances across his white windows that he seemed drawn to. So, I thought either he was interested in these funky, eye catching big triangles or maybe he was beyond the constant eye contact. Cole was born 14 weeks early and spent 4 months in the hospital, so all his milestones were funky for a few years...like when he was 7 months, he was developmentally 4 months.
Anyway, at 7 months/4 months, we took him in to set up therapy (standard procedure when your baby is this preterm) and I mentioned the thing about the valances. They, of course,pooh-poohed it.
And Cole, who is the most affectionate giggly fellow you've ever met, was so snuggly with me and seemed so NOT autistic, that it never came up again until he was maybe 2 1/2. When he was two, and I put him in one morning of mom's day out, he would walk over to this one lady, hug her, pat her back and say "oh, sweeet!". He just melted people's hearts. But, he did not answer questions very well unless there was a book or something to use as a talking point. And that was our clue - the ignoring of his name when called, the inability to converse. And he used echolalia.
My rambling point here (I drink LOTS of coffee!) is that if your son does happen to be on the spectrum, and that is a big IF, he may not be as horribly bad off as I'm sure you occasionally worry about.
He's probably a nosy little fellow and is fine. Just watch like you are doing. Good mommy!
My son had great eye contact from birth to about 10 or 11 months. And I mean great! But it is possible he was looking intently at my mouth. How is his eye contact with others- does he look away and avoid their eyes? That is how it started with H. He started avoiding my husband's eyes first, then other family and doctors, strangers. His eye contact is back--but in brief periods for those outside the family.