vcuddy, I agree with you completely. He IS NOT doing this for attention.
Kath
No I do not think Justin's behavior is for attention. My boys do the same thing. They do not want to go to that school. I thought they just needed to adjust, they didn't like not being in control. They kept telling me it would get better. Then school is out and everytime I even drive down that street they start crying and screaming. As soon as I pass that school all screaming stops instantly. That is not an attention seeking behavior. That is a don't make me go there behavior. Now I am wondering exactly what went on at that school. the private speech path they are seeing now thinks trust was broken. They were forced to perform, and they have performance anxiety. THey test her to see if she is going to force them. Its been kind of sad to watch them. After 2 months they are so much better. They do not scream at all at therapy and can't get enough. They comply and do everything asked of them, the school would probably faint and wonder where Nikolas went. I am so glad they aren't going back to that school. Don't let that teacher tell you that, that is ignorant. That teacher probably shouldn't be teaching kids with autism, I know the one we had probably shouldn't have been. The dad for what ever reason calms him down, it might be mainly because he is a man. For whatever reason my boys respond better to men. But I sure wouldn't listen to that teacher, I think that is pure nonsense.Any teacher that assumes your child is just behaving badly needs to recieve a big wake up call!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would go in that meeting with all the reading materials you can find that relate to your child and his issues and suggest since he (the teacher) is in the business of educating he should educate himself!
Here is the biggest hug I can muster.................
My thoughts wil be with you and your son. I have a feeling that tomorrow will be the start to better times for you adn Justin.
Justin and I live in California. I wish there was some one from this board who lived closer...I sure need support.
The next question is, would you keep him in school, or another school, or out of school all together?
There have been so many changes in his life, all just within the last year...4 at that school within the last 7 months. I have never been this lost in all my life....
I too hope that tomorrow goes well for your son. You are bringing in the bigWELL, IT IS THE BIG DAY TOMORROW AND I DO NOT MIND SAYING I AM VERY SCARED. TODAY DROPPING JUSTIN OFF BECAME UGLY BETWEEN ONE OF THE DAD'S THAT HELP ME AND JUSTIN'S TEACHER...HIS TEACHER DOES NOT WANT ANYONE TO HELP ME GET JUSTIN TO SCHOOL IN THE MORNING. HE WANTS JUST ME AND THE SCHOOL. THE THING IS, JUSTIN HAS BEHAVIORS IN THE CAR AS SOON AS WE HIT THE BLOCK THE SCHOOL IS ON.SO SAFETY IS THE ISSUE, ALONG WITH THE FACT THAT THIS DAD FOR THE PAST WEEK , HAD JUSTIN OUT OF THE CAR AND WALKING TO CLASS WITH NO ISSUES.
THE TEACHER IS SAYING THAT JUSTIN IS HAVING THESE BEHAVIORS BECAUSE HE WANTS THE ATTENTION, AND HAVING PEOPLE THERE IN THE MORNING FEEDS THIS ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIOR THAT JUSTIN HAS. I DO NOT AGREE THAT IS DONE FOR ATTENTION, I KNOW JUSTIN IS SHOWING ME HE DOES NOT WANT TO BE AT SCHOOL, THAT HE DOES NOT WANT TO LEAVE MY SIDE.
TOMORROW THE LAWYER WILL BE THERE AND AN ADVOCATE, I AM SO ANGRY AT EVERYTHING I JUST WANT TO TAKE A BAT(PLASTIC OF COURSE) AND WACK ALL THE PEOPLE WHO KEEP GIVING ME FLACK.
I AM AFRAID FOR MY SON'S FUTURE..PLEASE THINK GOOD THOUGHTS FOR US, THE MEETING IS AT 10 A.M. AND DO YOU THINK JUSTIN'S BEHAVIOR IS FOR ATTENTION?
I am glad you have a lawyer and an advocate there. I will be thinking of you and Justin, tomorrow![QUOTE=vcuddy]Justin and I live in California. I wish there was some one from this board who lived closer...I sure need support.
The next question is, would you keep him in school, or another school, or out of school all together?
There have been so many changes in his life, all just within the last year...4 at that school within the last 7 months. I have never been this lost in all my life....
[/QUOTE]
Oh great big hugs! I am facing the same thing. Keep them in, change schools, or take them out completely and try to do it myself. I have decided for now to change schools and to cut their day down. They are 4 and going full time 5 days a week. So I have decided at least at the begining to let them come home right before lunch since afternoons are eating, sleeping and watching tv anyway from what I have seen at the last 2 schools. My boys too have been through a lot of change too. This will be school #3. Teacher #3. Not to mention all the therapists and summer school teachers. Best of luck to you.
It's possible that it's for attention, but it's so easy for everyone to jump to that conclusion and ignore the very real alternatives. And when they say he just wants attention, they're cheapening the concept. A person can want attention for reasons of support, not just to be manipulative.
When systematically analyzing the reasons why a challenging behavior is occuring, try the acronym TEASE:
<quote>
T- is for Tangibles. To get food, obtain activities, get toys, or protect personal space.
E- is for Escape/Avoidance. Difficult tasks (bath time, hair cuts, picking up toys), change in routine, Interruption in a desired activity, avoid hugs, affection, or attention.
A- is for Attention. Obtain hugs, Parent Attention, Interactions from others.
S- is for Sensory (Self reinforcement or stimulation). Obtain sensory input, rocking, head banging, hand flapping, spinning somersaults, finger flicking, leg banging.
E- End of reasons. Meaning, once you find out the reason or function of the behavior, it can bring an end to it, or an end to your concern for it.
<unquote>
Source: http://216.239.59.104/search?q=cache
Good luck with your meeting. I'll be thinking of you.
Good luck! I will be keeping you in my thoughts as well.bumpYou mentioned how the teacher prevented the other Daddy from helping. THAT IS SO VERY WRONG. From the way the teacher ascribed "attention seeking" as the origin of your son's problem, it really reflects a battle you have up ahead !!
Be STRONG !!! Be EQUIPPED !!! You will be in my thoughts on Tuesday...
[QUOTE=vcuddy]Justin and I live in California. I wish there was some one from this board who lived closer...I sure need support.
[/QUOTE]Good luck. I wish you both the best.
If having that other person there makes thing safer and eaiser in the mornings then do it. Maybe he feels safer with him there.
HEY EVERYONE I POSTED ANOTHER THREAD WITH THE RESULTS OF THE MEETING....Just a new little bumpy bump Good Luck!! Thinking of you here!I hope your meeting went well.....As a single parent myself.... I always get nervous the night before Quinn's meeting myselfBump. It's only 6:30 in CA, so I hope you will get a chance to let us know how it went.Please - how did it go???????????????? You are in our thoughts and prayers!Any news? I am thinking of you...hope you get in touch soon.Bumping... and waiting for news...I hate meetings because I am not a confrontational person by nature, but sometimes we have to do what we have to do. My thoughts are with you......
Hope everything went well. Let us know.