I have had soooo mnay similar situations with ds... Just know that you are not alon. I feel sometimes like ds has the worst behavior that any therapist has ever seen and that I have failed him somehow ..but I know deep down that really isnt tru. You did every thing right in the difficult situation you were in! Hope today is a better day.Thats tough! I think you handled it well. Hang in there.
Sorry you had such a rough time. I know how days like that can be.
Karrie
I probably will when the boys get to sleep. I just feel so horrible.
Stephen's Birth23 program is hosting structured playgroups for kids that are/were in the program. We went on Tuesday, and it was a little rough. Daniel got overloaded, but not too fast, so we had an OK time, but towards the end it was rough. All the therapist/teachers that were there to help assured me it was just because it was the first day.
I found out today just how wrong they were. We got there, and it started alright. Some of the kids were playing with Stephen. When Daniel caught sight, he'd go over to his brother and all the other kids would leave. I'm not sure if they were consciously doing this or if it was a random occurrence. After a while, Daniel had a teacher shadowing him, and trying to get him to play with certain toys.
Well, Daniel finally broke when one of the other kids took "his" toy and ran off with it (Daniel was about to pick it back up, and the other kid got to it first). He started screaming and kicking and I was struggling to pick him up to get to a safe area. And got him to one and was trying my best to confide him to the space so no one would get hurt. It was rough. Really rough. Of course, all the mother's turned and stared.. Two of the workers were trying to help, but were trying to give in to him (it was really a moot point by the time they actually tried to give in).. One of them kept looking at him even though I said to not pay attention to him. (Not looking into his eye, just in his direction, but I think we all know how that can be almost the same as giving in.)
He wouldn't calm down to get something to drink or eat. He did calm down long enough to go pee pee, but we got back into the room and he just started all over again. I finally coaxed him outside, because they went to the playground, and he was fine out there.. But when we came back into that room, he started again.
I seriously don't know if the room was just sensory overload. I've never had a complaint that he had these problems in preschool. We never have these problems at a regular house playgroup. But something is just not clicking right with him. I figure, it won't hurt Stephen to miss next week, and then start the week after next when Daniel is in summer school. But it just makes me want to cry. And one of the people was kind enough to ask me if I was okay... I had to be honest.. I was NOT ok. I could hear Stephen laughing and playing with kids all over, and I spent the whole time in a corner of a room hoping Daniel would just calm down.
Nothing to add, but my sympathy, and I TOTALLY agree with Anna -- it takes T longer than other kids to adjust to a new environment (but I was just thinking, she is getting BETTER at that!).
Can you try coming to the play day, and if he has tells that he is tired or overwhelmed leave a little early? Easing him into a full day?
We all understand..we are here for you and please be assured he will learn to cope better over time...Sarah screamed at any filled room of people, kids~all the noise and activities set her off and now it doesnt phaze her at all....these are the hard years you are in right now and it will pass..just try to help him as best you can and make lots of social stories..maybe see if teacher will let you take pics of her and kids so you can make a book (some teachers will~some wont) but explain how it will help him overcome his anxieties and help him get more excited to come to school. Good luck:)
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