A question and a vent... | Autism PDD

Evie - I think its too early to tell for our kids about MR - My son is completely non-verbal as well but I dont really worry about MR - enough time to worry about that when he is 6
I think its great that he has become more affectionate and I am sure you will see progress when he starts EI

Sarah at 3 had less than 5 words she may or may not of spoken in the day~totally nonfunctional..she was like Fred's girls..no one existed except her but she did love to watch teletubbies:(

When she started VB/ABA and speech we made pictures of everything in her world and slowly expanded it..made small albums to go over with her point to us, foods, toys, places ect...it made a huge difference! Make a schedule poster of his day including: morn.noon.eve. night with pictures of foods, toys and snacks he would be getting at those times..Sarah was so indifferent to talking or it ..mattering so we made it matter for her:) It was my number#1 goal for her to talk...I didnt care about nothing else!

....she first started really talking within 6 months although articulation was horrible and still 1-2 words she would use..when prompted..she was so adversive to talking I thought she had oral sensitivity to using her mouth..seriously

It took another year of intense speech(2 hours a week) to erase the articulation problems and now she speaks perfectly and talks in paragraphs with little grammer blips here and there..she is more affectionate now with all of us and loves to use her words now:)

Sorry, all, I haven't been around much lately...trying to get ready for Jason's IEP meeting next week!

I've been reading the boards, trying to catch up, and something on another thread caught my eye. My son doesn't have any language anymore...nothing from him at all in almost two months now, and he's mostly silent. Not even babbling. However, he doesn't seem to get frustrated by this at all. He'll bring me a sippy cup when he's thirsty, or other container with some liquid in it. He's also become a great deal more affectionate...in his way. Smashing my nose with his nose, etc, and clingy hugs. He's also playing a bit more with his brothers, but there is still no attempts to talk...not even echolia!

Now, this is something I'm going to bring up as needing to be addressed in the meeting, but I'm wondering if any of y'alls nonverbal kiddos (or when they were nonverbal) were like this as well.

It's really bothering me, him having this lack of language and limited facial expressions. He alternates between grimacing and a really flat affect. He's also getting quite aggressive with me, pushing me around, kicking me, and even pulling my hair. All this with no expression on his face, or even much babbling. I honestly don't know what to make of this. I am really hoping that we will see some improvement in the future, once therapy starts (Which probably won't be until late August!!), but things aren't looking good right now.

All the ASD kids I read about that do well are much more social and verbal than Jason is, and I'm starting to get the sneaking suspicion that he might also have some mental retardation. Of course, it's too soon to know that, so I try not to worry about that too much.

I don't mean to upset anyone here, I'm just really kind of venting, and I'm trying to find my way through this. I have accepted the diagnosis, but now I'm starting to feel really guilty and incapable.

Hi Evie,

I'm still up, so I'll chat at ya'. My daughters are very unsocial, too - at three, it was much worse. True, they both had language at three, but if you can imagine a little three year old walking around, making comments about things, but never actually directing their comments towards another person - that was the picture (plus, we're just talking simple phrases - still lots of jargoning - they weren't speaking in sentences or anything). They didn't push us around or anything, but it was clear then, and still is to an extent, that we had no greater significance to them than other objects in the environment, and yeah, that's a tough feeling to have, especially when these people who percieve you as an object are constantly making demands of you. Ugh.

In some ways, he sounds more social than the girls were at that age. At taht age, the girls were barely aware of people at all - they were into toys and videos and such, but really could care less if there were other people around or not. No affection at all - even smashing noses or clingy hugs - still not much of that, actually - but some. Now, they are much better - they still don't have much affection - but they at least recognize us and are excited to see us when we get home, no how to 'turn on the charm' (i.e. offer hugs and kisses) when they want something (Hey, it's superficial, but I'll take it), and definitely appreciate hearing our praise and are itnerested in spending time with us.

So, I don't know exactly what to say, other than he's still real young and a lot can change over the next couple of years and he might present as a completely different child by the time he starts school... or not... I know, it's so hard, not knowing. Not knowing is the hardest part of all of this.

It sounds like he could really benefit from PECS, the way he's leading you to have his needs met. By many accounts, PECS can be useful in helping kids learn that language can get them things easier than pulling people around or gesturing or bringing them their cup. Might be somethng to look into.

Oh, one other things - the girls never had echolalia either. This is a stage of language acquisition that some kids go through, but others just don't.

Hi, fred, how's doins'?

The funny thing about Jason's sociability is that it comes and goes throughout the day, and also he'll go weeks without appearing to notice anyone!

I am actually very encouraged by him bringing me his sippy cup, and twice in the last two days, he's actually come to me for comforting when something (God knows what,lol) upset him! He's not done that since he was an infant! I'm really glad about that.

However, by the same token, the aggressiveness is getting pretty upsetting. It's been suggested that he see a psychologist, (including from the original, dx'ing neuropsych), but I worry about that. I know he's too young for any kind of drugs, but I think it would just upset him, if he even interacted with the psych at all. Grr. The PECS thing is going to start soon (digital camera next week, yay!), and I hope to see some improved communication with that, but so far he seems to lack any real motivation to communicate for the most part.

BTW, I've watched some of the vids you posted with the girls, and to my layman's eye, it looks to me like they're doing wonderfully, language-wise, and they seemed to be playing pretty well, too. And their art is simply awesome! I'm totally impressed!

Thanks - remember though, they're going to be five soon - a lot can change between 3-5.

A lot of the behavior might just be communication, so, hopefully, once communication is better established, some of that stuff will fade. We never had hitting, but had massive, unexplained tantrums. They still have tantrums, but now at least we know why (and can choose our battles, so to speak). As a result, tantrums are much less a problem then before they could effectively communicate.