What to do about pushing? | Autism PDD

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My son is a "pusher" and it makes me crazy.   He is always pushing his little sister, but not in anger.   But he pushes her hard enough that she falls to the ground.  He crashes into his cousins and other kids too.   He thinks it's hilarious.

I started thinking about it and I wonder if what he is really doing to trying to play with his sister but <because of his autism> he doen't really know how to initiate or play with another child.   He really seems to love his sister and always wants her around but then he just chases her and pushes her down.

I wish I could think of a way to teach him or demonstrate to him how to play with and interact with his sister instead of the pushing game.   I really think the root of the pushing problem isn't aggression, but rather another symptom of the social component of this disorder.

 

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My son is a "pusher" and it makes me crazy.   He is always pushing his little sister, but not in anger.   But he pushes her hard enough that she falls to the ground.  He crashes into his cousins and other kids too.   He thinks it's hilarious.

I started thinking about it and I wonder if what he is really doing to trying to play with his sister but <because of his autism> he doen't really know how to initiate or play with another child.   He really seems to love his sister and always wants her around but then he just chases her and pushes her down.

I wish I could think of a way to teach him or demonstrate to him how to play with and interact with his sister instead of the pushing game.   I really think the root of the pushing problem isn't aggression, but rather another symptom of the social component of this disorder.

 

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You just described my son, love often hurts when it comes from Wyatt! My older son, his cousins, his father and I, the dog, we all get pushed and crashed. Never because he's mad. Usually when he wants to engage in play. I may try reccomending he 

edited to add... He used to seem to think the other kids enjoyed it, as he used to laugh.

heavensdj39257.7786574074

You might want to try a social story, reading it frequently, especially just before a situation where he's likely to push.  There are many good examples under the topic "Sample social stories" (you can search using the button at the top of this page).  One story is called "Nice hands, naughty hands" and you'll want to praise him like crazy for using "nice hands." 

Good luck with everything.

My son is the same way, but the more exposure he gets to children and different adults the better his sensory issues get.  I also make him apologize when he is being tested or pushy.  In the end, he cannot go around pushing people because they are in "his" space, so I try to channel that anxiety out in other productive ways.  I also get in his space more because I don't care about him pushing me.  However, he cannot go around pushing other children.  I tell him that he canNOT do that.  I also make it less invasive by taking it slowly.  I let him know that I am not going anywhere and that he has to deal with my presence.   I think it's teaching him tolerance and I am teaching him that a close presence is not a threat to him.  It has gotten better, but we are still dealing with these issues too.


I look forward to hearing other parents give their advice. 
My 3yo boy is always "pushy" on the playground especially on the slide--
he will try to push his way to the front of the line, or not wait until the
child in front of him to finish sliding- he will charge ahead and crash into
them.

Now that he's getting big for his age I get nasty looks/comments from
parents of kids who are smaller than he is.

Right now he only has speech and OT at home, which really do nothing
for his social skills. He will start preschool in Sep (with 1 on 1 shadow)--
hopefully this will improve?Our OT says this is for proprioceptive input--they like the feel of pressure on their joints--so maybe try to have him push on a wall to get the urge out. Try to watch him--sometimes you can tell by how quickly they're moving or how revved they are getting as to when something like that is likely to happen. Try to watch for it and get him to calm down before a pushing incident. Having said all that, DS has pushed down so many kids intentionally/unintentionally, that it is a miracle no one has gotten seriously hurt. I do my best to try to prevent it, but it is not easy (as you must know).
Nowwhat
My ds did the same thing from age 3-4. He always smiled when he did it
and usually when he was excited about somehing. We tried to incourage
him to clap hands or stomp feet or push something instead. It stopped
after one year.

My 3 yo seems to love to push other kids that come into contact with him, or just in his vicinity. It doesnt seem malicious, hes not an agressive person but he does have sensory issues and hes verbally delayed although he does have language. We typically will diffuse the situation, make him apologize, but he just doesnt seem to get it. We dont know how to teach him that this is unacceptable behavior.

Anyone experience this with your kids? What did you do? Thanks!

my son has been pushing a lot lately when he gets hyper... starts pushing you from behind or even pretending to punch you. its not aggressive,more like in a playful funny way... but its really frustrating on stopping it.
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