quick question | Autism PDD

OHHHH MY Son is the EXACT same way!!! It's like Mommy can NOT show ANY emotion other than a smile!! LOL! Well, not just Mommy, but none of us except HIM!! So...NO you're NOT going crazy

LINDA...akaMWN64...aka Tony'sMomIt seems like most of what i have read regarding emotion and children with autism shows that they don't relate to it much. But with my boys, they FREAK OUT if I show any emotion at all. If I get really happy and tears come into my eyes, they start screaming. If i laugh so hard i cry, they start screaming. If I truly DO cry, they start screaming. Sometimes even if I am just really happy, they'll act really worried, and Noah will say "mommy's crying." I say, "no, honey Mommy's not craying, Mommy's happy." He'll then repeat that sentence, and move onto whatever he was doing. But if i show any emotion at all, it is enough for a complete meltdown. Also, if I discipline one of them, the other one will have a complete meltdown. It is so frustrating, because my voice always has to be completely calm, and I have to move very paced and evenly, or they freak out. I am a very animated, quirky, jerky sort of type A person, so this has been hard on me.
But what i want to know is, Have any of you had these problems?
I have bought many emotion books to read to them, to try to explain emotions, and when we watch movies I'll say "Alladin is happy." or "Nemo is sad." But nothing seems to get through to them that emotion is OK. When I cry and they get upset, i'll tell them, "mommy is allowed to cry, Mommy is allowed to get upset, just like you." It's like they don't hear me (which is common with them.)

ANYWAY.... any suggestions or similar stories so i don't feel so crazy? I am afraid that if I shelter them too much from emotions they will never learn, but I don't want to do any damage to them, because they seem so fragile.

I think I all I have found is labeling and giving emotions a face.

So "nemo is sad". We can see he is sad because he has a frown. (imitate frown on you and get child to trace frown on your face, then mimick on child's face). Say "Child has frown, he must feel sad." Sad feels like you want to cry, your tummy has a funny feeling, etc etc. Then after you paint the picture of sad, go on to explain being sad is okay because it tells me that you need hug or it is okay because everyone feels sad sometimes... give scenerios of when you and him felt sad. Of course, adapt for time limit your child can handle and how much can understand.

Right now, my ds says he feels nothing at all, ever. He can now recognize happy and frustrated in me (lol, that tells you alot, doesn't it :P). I think the key to this one for my ds is being able to label what emotions look like... then once that is mastered, teach how to recognize in self and how to deal with self and that emotion. This I think may be adaptable for you as you are teaching them how to react appropriately to others emotions.. so they have to know thier own and how thiers are suppose to look

Do your kids have an OT??? Might be able to get some ideas. I have a book called "Feelings" To be honest, books haven't helped us... photographs worked better... for some reason books are to detached for my ds

I know the two children with autism I watch are *very* intune to mine and mom's emotions. If mom is upset, one child gets very aggressive, the other tries to take care of her. The can read her like a book and thier behaviour mimicks her emotions. Just so you know your not totally alone in this aspect :)
Hye Nikki, I don't know if your kids like music but Laurie Berkner has a cd called victor vito and on that cd there is an emotion song ( can't think of the name and will dig up the cd case if i can find it ) and in the song she talks about things ect "this is the story of when i cried,,," weel the music goes along with the emotions so when sad, the music is slow and soft, happy ..upbeat ect. perhaps music might be a way to indroduce feelings, connor always cries when he hears Kelly Clarkson's "breakaway" the tears just stream down his face but i think its a good start because he connects the music with emotion.I'll have to find that CD! I never know how they will react to music. Jonah likes a very limited selection that changes often! The majority of the time he covers his ears, rocks back and forth and shuts down. But Noah like music pretty well.

The fact they aren't completely in love with music is also very hard on me, since I play 5 instruments, and have written music since I was 9! I keep hoping they'll come around. We move in 2 weeks, and I will finally have my piano in the house with us, so maybe they will get into it!

Thanks for the suggestions... I have finals next week, so now I must sign off, and try to study!

Here is a link for emotion flashcards :)

http://www.abcteach.com/directory/basics/flashcards/emotions /

Lots of other great stuff on it too.
We drew faces on a magna doodle going over the different emotions and then moved to imitating them on my face then having my DS imitate them. He has a good grasp on happy, angry, hurt, suprised, and can recognize sad. Though he has trouble admitting he is sad and seems to understand upset a bit better. His preschool also used emotion charts to help him recognize what emotions he was feeling and to better express them.
When I am happy, Luke is happy, too, and usually smiles at me. When I'm sad and I cry ... he seems that he couldn't care less! maybe he's too young yet ... All of our kids are different.
My grandson always related to feeling, and reacted to them.
A loud or angry voice on TV would make him cry.
He notices sad and happy, and now at just turned five reacts appropriately.
It is good for our kids early on to show some reaction, whether it is happy or sad.
This tells us that they are aware of others.
Pecs of happy and sad faces created within pec story would be a good way to go.

OHHHH, Thank you! Those flashcards are great! And free too! Thanks!

My oldest has always reacted to emotions. For example, the song by sarah mclauglin, Angle, made him cry every time he heard it. And he was only 4 weeks old! He also picks apart movies and cartoons with heavy emotional content like disney. gosh disney must have been a disturbed man. every one of his cartoons, one or both parents buy the farm! LOL
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