Feedback Needed Daycare situation | Autism PDD

Ok here goes as you all know DD gets ECI therapy but they feel she has progressed to the point where she will only get OT. In fact she won't get OT actually but they are keeping her in the program. They want me to put her in a daycare for part of the week to hopefully transition her into being around other kids her own age.

She will be 3 in Dec. so they feel this would get her ready for that. I am having mixed feelings. I am not sure it is the best, she is just now starting to feel secure since all her issues with birth mother. I know when she goes into public her sensory issues are great!!!

I just wanted to know if any of you have seen the pro/cons of daycare in instances as these.

Our situation with daycare has been that when Nate was 2-1/2 we put him in daycare because I had a full-time job, he went M-F 7am - 4pm. His speech improved dramatically at that time, in fact it wasn't until Dec of last year that the daycare teacher suggested he be evaluated for his speech problems. He was no problem in school, he just went along with everyone else. He isn't very social and doesn't interact with any of the other kids unless it's a group activity and then he just does what they do. The psychologist and social worker in his clinic told us to KEEP him in daycare because he needed exposed to the children his own age and needed the age appropriate interaction.

BUT DO NOT DO what I did....he was going everyday and now that we have taken him to 3-days per week and speech 2-days per week,it is a struggle to get him to go. He loves his teachers and he used to like going with NO trouble at all in the mornings, however it was the ROUTINE! He needs his routine to make sense to him...we now use a picture board calendar and he knows when he is going to school and when he has speech, etc. and it has helped tremendously.

I think the key to the daycare situation, special needs or not, is that you have to be PROACTIVE in the situation and do what is best for your child in routine, activities, type of teaching methods, size, etc. I think that as long as you are in control of what goes on to some extent that it not only makes you feel better about the school, but that you're doing the right thing. On my days off I volunteer there and go on all of the field trips so I have gotten to know the teachers. They are all older women, mostly grandmas, and they have been doing this for 15+ years most of them. I can walk in anytime and they let me stay everyday as long as I needed to for the first few weeks to ease the transition. They let me drop him off for an hour at a time in the beginning...I say, research the daycares and try it. If it is truly a struggle after a week or two then you gave it your best shot! Have a plan in place and stick to it! You know what's best for your child and you only want to make progress for her!

Good luck!

~HollieDaycare has bee WONDERFUL for both of my boys. I kept them at hom with me until they were almost 3. I LOVED being home with them, and the change has been harder on me than on them. I think they like daycare because there is a fairly strict schedule, and they know what to expect everyday. Jonah has no interaction with the othe kids, but it has still helped him tremendously. I agree with what the other mothers said, research, and be completely upfront with the center.
At my boys' daycare there was this really strict "mean" teacher that i worried about. i thought she was being too mean. She is their favorite teacher! I think they like how strict she is with them, and how she pushes them alittle farther than I would. So, you never know how your child will react. What you may think is too much for them, may be just right!

My ds has been in daycare since he was 9 mos. He is in his 3rd daycare and this one is the best fit. I found the first 2 did not respect my input enough and we weren't a team. It was to my ds detriment because he would melt down since we were not all being consistent (such as using same "key" words and phrases)

Pros: my ds "appears" only 3 yrs behind behaviourally. He can "appear" to act socially but it is obvious it is learned and not him knowing what to do.. but that is first step to learning. my ds EATS!!!!! Daycare means he will eat one meal at day because all the other kids are and they pay specail attention to it because they know how hard it is for me at home. (it is worth the money just for that). I feel it helped him start up and understand the routine better for when he started school. He has other positive influences who can see the same situation in a different light. We can bounce ideas and figure out how to modify his life/surroundings ect and come up with strategies together. It gives me the freedom to have my life/work so I can still be me and get that break to deal with my ds fresh (and not overwhelmed and frustrated all the time). They expose him to variety of sensory activities... he is more willing to take risk in daycare environment in that domain there. We have a worker come in to help us develop strategies so we can all be consistent and share our ideas. We made friends and have regular playdates.

Ask about philosophy and discipline techniques. Ask how involved parents can be. Find out what the guidelines are.. and when they will call you. Look at daily sheets to see what it includes (like emotions, sleep times, ect). Give them scenerios and ask them how they would deal with it... and they how they would feel if you had different way, would they be open to trying it. Ask them how they will help her with her sensory issues in public.. what strategies they will put in place so they can set her up for success. Write down all the questions so when you get to daycare it isn't overwhelming (my mistake, i had tons of things I had to call back and ask :P)

Daycare I have my ds in will set up meetings as frequently as I want. We have a communication book that goes from school to daycare to me. I think that finding the right "fit" is the key to success. If you get the right teachers, they will make it work and make your dd as comfortable and seamlessly transistion as possible. Check about enhanced support. Where I live, kids with disabilities can have one-on-one support within a daycare setting... I know two children at my ds daycare who had the one-on-one support :) Respit money can be used for this too if you are concerned.

Thanks for the advice. Yes, I think I am being the big baby here and having a harder time about it. We have an appointment tomorrow to go an checkout one near our home. It does come highly recommended in this area. Alot of our teachers put their children there. I called yesterday and told them a little about her. DD OT is coming with us. ECI had placed 2 other children there before and I am told they did really well.

If she does like she usually does going in will be a breeze its leaving places that are a problem. Not sure why but the transition leaving is harder than going.
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