Cyndie good luck exs are a pain. Often the courts seem to allow them to drop in and out of kids lives which is a shame.. All kids need stable parents. I will keep you in my thoughts..Cyndie,
You poor dear. Will pray for you and your son to get through this time quickly.
Kellie
HEY ALL, CHRSITIANS DADDY JUST CAME HOME YESTERDAY, LUCKY LUCKY ME!!
I'm sorry you are going through this with the ex. You and christian will be in my thoughts and prayers. Take care,
Karrie
hi cyndie sorry u are having such a naff time at mo. just wanted to let u know im thinking of u xxx
I know how rough it is for our kids to go through this in and out BS from a parent who has little if any contact with them. My kids go through it too. I know how hard it is on us to watch them go through it. Unfortunately Susan is right ... It doesnt seem most courts care.
My suggestions....
KEEP A JOURNAL - record when his father sees him and when his father calls him, or contacts him...
Record the behaviors every day... it will show a pattern in the change and upset for the courts to look at
Get him a private therapist where this can be brought up and discussed and talked and worked through
Whenever possible give Christian notice his father will be visiting with him and prepare him with a calander and pictures
I would re evaluate the relationship with the grandparents. Obviously they can't be trusted if they are goin gto go behind your back . Im sure they love Christian and they may be helpful in giving you a break... BUT what is more important.. the breaks or Christians well being? If the grandparents are not considerate enough to respect your wishes and doing what is best for Christian then I would set up minimal scheduled visits for them with him . Grandparent visitation is generally a few hours 1 day a month.
As far as the visits from the father what does the visitation agreement state? I would not allow anything more than what it says and be very firm about it. I would also try to get legal aid or someone involved even child protective services...... Chrisitans upsets need documented and although the courts probably wont act right away you need things in place to protect him and do what is best for him! Good Luck Cyndie you and Christian are in our thoughts and prayers.
Most courts will put access first because the assumption isn't that the bio-dad is useless. The assumption is that a child will benefit from both parents.
Only way to stop access is to have other parent declared unfit which usually takes something pretty drastic (they tried supervised access first)
Where I live grandparents have NO rights unless father is deceased/uncapable by illness ect (thank goodness for me)
Check your local laws to see what applies to you! You can usually find it on state website.
My ex took me to court for weekend access .. I fought it because he is inconsistent, rarely calls, rarely does take the access weekend, etc *but* he still gets one weekend a mos despite the behavioural problems. The courts will anticipate beh prob as unavoidable since most children have them... usually you have to show extreme (pics with date on help).
Go see a lawyer, some will give you free consultation or work at a reduced fee if they know you cannot afford full fee, some skip the retainer and set up payment plan. Lots of options if you shop around... I like working with the smaller firms best, I find they are in for the job more than the money of big firms
Cyndie,
You have my sympathy. Dealing with the girlfriend is the worst. They can twist a Dad who is aready lazy about visitation and totally take Daddy away.
Poor Christian he is to young to understand this. I feel so bad for the little guy.
You have got some good advice it's just so unfair to have to fight all the time. I would definatly KEEP THAT JORNAL.
Nelle
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