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 Topic: Advice, Please....
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morganalefey
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| Posted: November 04 2009 at 11:46am | IP Logged
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Hello, everyone!
I've posted a couple times before, and I wish I had more to contribute to this group. I just don't have much experience with any of this. Anyway, I'm here because I'm looking for some "What would you do?" advice.
My son, Mason is nearly 4. He has some mild developmental delays, language and social skills. We had him tested by the school system (ADOS) and it scored him right on the cut-off for having an ASD. They decided to write his IEP as Developmentally delayed and not Pervasive Developmental Delay because the psych felt that w/some therapies he would no longer be scoring on the spectrum at all. They were really on the fence as to whether or not to qualify him for services at all. They did, so he is attending their special ed pre-school 2 days/wk. He is also attending a "typical" pre-school 2 days/wk.
He is adjusting and thriving at the regular pre school. He wants to go, is cooperative and is doing well. This is NOT happening at the sp. ed. pre-school. I don't know what happened, exactly, but he was HYSTERICAL there one day about getting his picture taken. I have Never, ever seen him behave that way. I've seen him be done w/getting his pic taken, I've seen him startle at the flash, but I have NEVER seen him be upset in that way about pictures. There have been a few other small instances that have left him weepy at school. Last Friday, I sent him in w/field trip money. After school, his teacher called to ask me if I'm sure I want him to go, because he is not adjusting to change well at school (This is not a big issue at home. He needs verbal cues, and then he's fine. Also, he did 12 wks of social skills therapy this summer, where the behavior therapist documented that he transitioned well with a verbal cue). I told her I would talk to my husband and get back to her.
This morning he did not want to go to school At All. He loves the bus, and the bus ladies, and for the first time Ever didn't want to get on the bus. After school, before he got home, his teacher called me and told me he got off the bus crying and cried for the next 1/2 hr. I told her I was concerned because he isn't having these issues at the other school, and that I think something/one there must be triggering his meltdowns. I sort of through out some of my ideas on what could be triggering it, and seh really blew me off. I spent 5 minutes on the phone with her and felt the entire time that she was trying to ring off. She actually seemed offended when I suggested maybe one of the kids in class is bothering him. Her only suggestion to me was to add a 3rd day a week of him at that school. He goes there Wed. and Fri. mornings and she feels that the 4 day break is what's causing this issue. The thing is, he goes to the other school Tues and Thurs. afternoons, so he's getting the same 4 day break w/o the same issues.
It seems pretty obvious that something at the school is causing his anxiety, and he can't tell me what it is. I mean, really, what was she doing w/that camera to make him hysterically cry?!?!
I plan to go in to observe him in the classroom to see if I can pinpoint an issue, but I'm looking for advice from people who may have been there.
Would you add an extra day when your child obviously doesn't enjoy being there? MAYBE it's the 4 day break, but I really don't think so. I am now second guessing whether or not enrolling him in this school was a good idea. I do not appreciate the short tone of the conversation and feel like she should be more forthcoming w/me about what could be the problem.
Oh! And when the bus dropped him off, the driver and the aide both said he was absolutely fine on the bus, and didn't cry until they got to school because he didn't want to go. The bus is definately not the issue.
I'm sorry this is so long, and thank you in advance for your thoughts on this.
Tracy
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ctmom
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| Posted: November 04 2009 at 5:34pm | IP Logged
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I think the best thing you can do is go in and observe. If you still are not comfortable with the school and all he is getting is 2 days wk of preschool, i would think about pulling him and adding another day or 2 at the other school. Does he receive any other services at school- aba, speech, ot pt?
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Mom of 4 boys- youngest dx with pdd-nos
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OZZIE-ROZIES-MA
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| Posted: November 04 2009 at 6:48pm | IP Logged
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Why is he going to both schools?
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Alice
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morganalefey
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| Posted: November 05 2009 at 4:29am | IP Logged
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He is only receiving speech at the school.
He's going to the "typical" school because the psych felt that it was very important for him to be around peers to pick up their behaviors. He's going to the sp.ed. school because, of his delays and they wanted to keep an eye on his progress there.
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OZZIE-ROZIES-MA
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| Posted: November 05 2009 at 2:11pm | IP Logged
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If he's thriving and engaging in regular school he's making progress. It sounds like the special ed. school is causing more barriers than it's helping.
Perhaps, you can get speech services or supports at his regular school... they can be integrated into his curriculum. The SD has to provide the special services in the Least Restricitve Environment.
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Alice
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mrebele
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| Posted: November 06 2009 at 4:18pm | IP Logged
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My grandson had trouble in his special ed preschool. He regressed, cried,
began copying behaviors that were not good, and generally had a bad time.
My daughter decided to pull him out and she enrolled him in a regualar
preschool. He thrived there and began to love school again.
We think it was just that he did not need such a restrictive placement. Each
child is different and it might be that your son will also do better in a
regular preschool. Can they provide services in his regular preschool? That
is what my grandson's school district did.
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ann2boys
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| Posted: November 06 2009 at 8:07pm | IP Logged
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My thought is that the Sp Ed preschool is challenging him more than the reg. preschool....my 12 yr old loved his preschool but he was very overwhelmed with all the demands at the Sp Ed placement but i felt that he needed both....
I would call an emergency IEP and discuss your concerns with your case manager....
Maybe a behavioral consultant (paid by the district) can evaluate the situation at the Sp Ed school...
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Mom to 12 yr old boy (Aspie, ADHD/OCD/ODD/RAD/Seizures) and 6 yr old boy (ASD)
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LVKim8
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| Posted: November 07 2009 at 12:13am | IP Logged
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I would seriously consider pulling him out of the sp. ed preschool. If he is already thriving in the regular pre-k, that is his best bet for success. Keep in mind lots of kids are dev. delayed, speech, etc. But that does not mean they need a special ed classroom.
My NT dd had speech delays. The worst thing I could have done for her, IMO, was put her in a more restrictive environment. Because she was not very verbal, I kept her home until K. Now she is doing great in a regular school. If your ds is doing well in school already, he is that much further ahead. Makes you think if kids in sp. ed. classrooms are treated that much differently. One is happy, thriving environment, the other is not. I'm not saying this is true in all cases, but it makes you wonder.
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Mom to beautiful 9-yr old twin girls,1 w/Autism, 1 NT(w/ speech delays to age 5)
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